Blue Eyed Angel
by Goddess Evie
Summary: SEQUEL! Read Red Headed Goddess first. After the events of RHG the entire Quest family is involved in trying to help Jonny and Jessie heal. On top of that, Jonny is being charged with murder but how can he prove his innocence when he won't speak one word.
1. Chapter 1

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 1/?

Author: Goddess Evie

Date: December 12, 2011

Category: JJHR, Angst

Summary: The Quests deal with the direct aftermath of the events from _Red Headed Goddess_ at the Rockport police station.

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Fidelity", Regina Spektor does or "Sally's Song" (Amy Lee version, of course) which is owned by Danny Elfman or Tim Burton or they have joint custody. I merely use them to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: I'm not sure how many years ago it was that I finished _Red Headed Goddess_, and I'm not even going to bother to check. Nor can I say why inspiration to start the sequel suddenly hit when I have an unpublished alt-verse JQ WIP to work on and original fiction that needs my attention. But inspiration has indeed struck and I would not fight it (nor, I suspect, could I have). So, here is the first chapter of _Blue-eyed Angel_, the sequel to _Red Headed Goddess_. I make no promises as to the writing and release of successive chapters.

_Blue-eyed Angel_

Prologue: _Suppose I never ever met you…_

She felt like she'd known him all her life even though they hadn't met until they were twelve. Instantly she liked him despite being prepared to hate him. At the first sight of his sapphire eyes and lopsided smile she instantly forgave him for being the reason she'd gone without her father for eight years. She could never be jealous of this seraphim boy with sunshine hair.

He was her best friend from the beginning, her partner in crime, her sharer of laughter and tears, her equal in everything. He believed she could do anything even when everyone else doubted her and she doubted herself. She never felt looked down upon, inferior, or less when she was around him, even when other people tried to make her feel so. One glimpse of his confident smile and she felt ready to take on the world and come off conqueror.

When she thought of him she felt safe, important, special. His mop of blonde hair always falling in his blue eyes. His strong, well-maintained 6'5" body that she knew the other girls noticed though he never seemed to have any clue about them. The extra sparkle in his smile and his eyes when he gazed upon her that were absent when he looked at anyone else.

He shined brightly in the dark world, but he shined best and most brilliantly for his own family, the most important people in his life. The loss of his mother at a young age made him fiercely loyal to those he called family, and she held in reverence the privilege of being one of those people to him. Though he had many he called friends spanning every continent on the planet, he let few in close enough to see the pain and darkness he carried within him. Despite the darkness, he met each day with an optimistic smile and daring laughter. She didn't understand how he did it but she thanked God for him every day that he did.

He was overprotective of her which she fought him over at every turn, but she couldn't deny the many times he'd saved her life because of it. He did everything with passion, including fight, whether it was to save a loved one, right a wrong, or brawl with her. But he never let his own pride get in the way of their friendship and he had the never-ending patience to wait for her own stubbornness to subside until they could laugh at themselves for another stupid quarrel.

For lack of a better word, he was her soul-mate, though she rarely let herself dwell on that thought. She was not ready for the ramifications of what they meant. For now she would be satisfied with knowing that he'd never fail to surprise or amaze in some new way. And she'd never get tired of proclaiming to everyone that he was her best friend without question forever, no matter what…

Chapter 1: _I sense there's something in the wind that seems like tragedies at hand._

Benton rushed with his son Hadji into the Rockport police station amidst reporters and journalists from every news station and newspaper in Rockport shouting questions at him; questions he didn't fully understand or pay attention to. Flash bulbs blazed all around them almost blinding Benton and he kept his elder son close with a hand on his back. Apparently the news outlets had already heard the story of what had happened even before Benton and had arrived on scene ahead of him to get their story. Benton issued one curt and forceful "No comment". It effectively shut them up and they backed off enough for Benton and Hadji to get through the crowding digital recorders, camera men and microphones. A group of officers were just coming out of the front entrance to the department to greet him as he jogged up the front steps while the journalists and reporters started up their questioning once more.

Race had not offered much information when he'd called, merely commented that things were bad-which Benton knew meant worse than anything else he could've said-and urged Benton to meet them at the police station as soon as possible. Though not one to break a law under any circumstances, Benton had driven at the highest speeds he felt safe at and was only slightly surprised that Hadji made no comment, though his son had ridden in the passenger seat clenching the door handle. Benton wondered whether it was worry for his driving or for his friends, but didn't ask.

The police station did not feel any different. Benton's mouth drew into a line as he looked around while he and Hadji were escorted past the front desk and through a non-descript entrance to the booking station which was no less busy even if Benton thought it should be. He had been initially relieved when Race had told him to come to the police station instead of the hospital, but as the officers led him and Hadji deeper into the station, Benton's apprehension grew.

Benton and Hadji moved with the officers through a locked door, into a quieter hallway and finally into a private room where Race sat at a table watching his daughter. Jessie sat in her chair hugging her knees to her chest, hiding must of her face behind her legs and staring at the table with unfocused eyes. Her red hair curtained around her, hiding even more of her face. She didn't look up when Benton and Hadji entered and Benton noted with alarm that she was wearing his son's black shirt.

Jonny was nowhere in sight.

Race rose when Benton and Hadji entered and Benton turned to him with the dread that had been growing internally plain on his face. Hadji moved around Race to go to Jessie but Race turned and caught Hadji by his arm before he got too close to his daughter. Hadji looked at Race with question in his eyes. Race responded with a solemn look and shake of his head. He released Hadji's arm and Benton watched his son circle cautiously around Jessie to take the seat next to her. He didn't lean in and attempt to touch or engage her in way. He clasped his hands together, one elbow on the back of the chair, the other on the edge of the table, and watched her with brotherly concern. Still she didn't look up or acknowledge him in any way.

"Race, what's going on?" Benton asked in a hushed tone. "And where's Jonny?"

Hadji perked up at that question. Race glanced over his shoulder at his daughter then gestured for Benton to exit back out into the hall. Race ushered all of the police officers out of the room as well. Race trusted Hadji alone to sit with the traumatized Jessie.

Out in the hall, once the door was firmly closed and Race chased away the officers with one of his famous looks, he rubbed tiredly at his eyes and let his exhaustion show as he leaned against the two way mirror. Benton looked behind his bodyguard at Hadji and Jessie sitting at the table like two statues.

Benton squared his gaze on Race. "What happened? Are they okay?"

"They aren't physically hurt beyond some irritation of the eyes and breathing passages due to pepper spray. We're not exactly sure what happened. Detective Dougan and I have been trying to piece together the evidence, but it's a slow process and we're still gathering information."

"What about Jonny and Jessie? What have they said?"

Race shook his head. "We can't get the story out of either of them. Jessie can't say anything without breaking down and Jonny…"

Benton's heart raced. "What about him? Race, tell me."

"He hasn't said a word since Dougan and I arrived on the scene. He won't speak for anyone or anything."

"Where is he? Let me see him. Let me see my son," Benton demanded.

Race held up his hands with the palms out. "Calm down, Benton. There's more you need to know."

Had he been conversing with anybody else, Benton would have run them down to get to Jonny. As things stood, it was only Benton's deep trust of Race that kept him from tearing the police station apart to find his missing son.

"Do you remember a kid named Zach Ellis?"

"He went to school with the kids. Graduated last year with Hadji. A pleasant young man, shy, gifted photographer…" Benton's eyebrows climbed his forehead as a piece clicked into place. He thought of the picture of Jessie in her athletic uniform shooting the basketball during a game and remembered where he'd seen it. "You mean he was…"

Race nodded. Benton looked at Hadji and Jessie wearing lost in her thoughts and wearing Jonny's shirt and another piece clicked into place.

"Oh my…he got to her. Race, how bad? What did he do to Jessie?"

Race closed his eyes and leaned his head against the glass. He exhaled loudly a sigh filled with worry and fear and fatigue.

Race answered without moving. His jaw was tight as he spoke with effort. "I don't know. He tried something, that's for sure, most likely exactly what we'd feared from reading his letters. The evidence certainly corroborates that theory. From the little Jessie has been able to tell, he surprised them at the park with pepper spray and chloroform. Otherwise he'd never have been taken either one of them, let alone the both of them together."

Race paused and Benton waited silently and patiently for his friend to continue. Retelling the afternoon's events regarding their children had to be at least as hard as hearing them.

"Jonny must have pursued. He got there before Dougan and me. When we arrived they were waiting outside for us. Whatever happened was already over."

"And what happened, or at least what's your best guess?"

Race let his head drop and opened his eyes to look Benton straight on.  
>"My best guess? Jonny dropped in on Zach and Jessie in the middle of…and a fight occurred. Benton, Zach's dead. Knife to the gut. I don't know how. There's not a lot of evidence to figure out events exactly and with neither Jonny nor Jessie speaking…"<p>

Race looked like he could collapse at any moment and Benton held his hands out in case he did. "They did a rape kit on Jessie," Race began to ramble. "She let them even though she hasn't let even me touch her since we found them. She wouldn't let me go in with her. I had to stand outside that door and listen to her sob as they…"

Benton reached out and supported Race by his shoulders. "She's safe," he whispered assurances. "She's right there. He can't harm her anymore. You said so yourself. He can't hurt her."

"Benton…Jonny-Dougan and I are only guessing," Race lifted his head and looked at Benton with such torture in his steel blue eyes that Benton backed off and had to lean against the wall himself.

"What about my son? What aren't you telling me?"

"We think he killed Zach. Not intentionally, but to save Jessie. It's the only explanation that makes sense. He hasn't said a word Benton."

The iron in Benton showed in his features. His dangerous side didn't come out often, usually only when it came to his sons, Race knew, and Jessie since she had joined become a member of their family. He recognized it in Benton now.

"Where's Jonny?"

"He's been taken into custody. Benton, they had to."

"Take me to him."

Benton's voice left no room for argument and Race didn't even try. With one last glance into the room at Jessie and Hadji, he motioned for Benton to follow with his head and started down the hall. In the booking room he paused to give instructions to have guards posted outside the room where Hadji sat with Jessie, but with express instructions for no one to enter the room without him there. Even though he was no policeman, the officers obeyed him without question. As soon as they orders were given, Race took Benton through a different door marked for interrogation rooms.

Detective Dougan turned and approached the men wearing an expression of apology.

"Benton, I'm glad you're here," Dougan greeted.

"Why did you arrest my son? He obviously acted in self-defense, which is perfectly legal."

"I can't make that call. He's going to have to be tried in court," Dougan replied with more grit than Race had previously thought him possessed of. "The only people who've been allowed in the room with him are myself, Race and the psychologist in there with him now."

At the word "psychologist" Benton deflated. Dougan turned and motioned for Benton to approach the two-way mirror through which his son, already wearing prison orange, sat in a barren room at a metal table staring at the woman holding a legal pad and pencil but obviously not seeing her. The tech adjusted the volume as the psychologist addressed his son and Benton leaned heavily on the ledge of the window feeling exactly how Race looked standing outside of the room where his daughter sat as still as stone and describing her examination.

"Jonathon, can you tell me what you're thinking about right at this moment?"

The psychologist's tone was soothing enough, non-threatening nor aggressive, but Benton couldn't bare being separated from Jonny when his son was so obviously in distress. He needed to be the one in there with his son, not some stranger.

"Let me see him. Please, detective, let me see my son."

Dougan nodded and turned toward the tech to speak into the microphone. It was attached to an ear piece the psychologist wore and she was professional enough not to reach for it and respond in any obvious way when Dougan spoke to her through the device.

"Jonathon, I have to leave for now, but I hope that you will find the strength to speak with me when I return."

She reached out to touch his hand, but he pulled it away although his eyes never moved. She pursed her lips as she rose and exited. Benton kept his expression neutral as she joined the group standing outside the room and silently appraised the new comers. Benton refused an ear piece from Dougan and exchanged a quick look with Race before slipping through the door and softly shutting it behind himself.

"Jonny?" Benton spoke gently to his son.

He was rewarded by seeing Jonny respond to anything for the first time since Race had brought him to his son. Jonny's gaze moved to Benton. He registered his father and his mouth moved as if to speak but he made no sound. Benton crossed to the only other chair in the room, the one vacated by the psychologist, and sat in it under Jonny's gaze. Benton moved the chair closer to his son and reached out for him. Jonny allowed his father to take him by the shoulders.

"Are you okay son?"

Jonny looked around the small room as if the answer would be found written on the walls somewhere. He moved his mouth again with the intention to speak but still could not find his voice. Benton moved one of his hands to the back of Jonny's neck and pulled him close so his son's forehead rested on his shoulder. Jonny's body shook as if with sobs, but no tears fell from his eyes.

Benton rested his cheek against Jonny's hair and looked at his own reflection in the two way mirror with utter hopelessness.

"Post bail immediately and call the best lawyer you know," Dougan advised as he led Benton and Race away from the interrogation rooms and to his own desk. "I really don't think you should have much problem convincing a jury that Jonny was acting in self-defense on behalf of himself and Jessie, but it won't hurt to have the best. Sometimes these trials don't go as expected even when they seem clear cut."

"This is a criminal suit?" Benton asked with surprise.

"The city has to charge him with murder. It's how they handle such cases. In court you can prove it was self-defense. And though bail could be set pretty high, your family is well-known and respected in the community so I don't think any of the judges will try to block you from getting Jonny released. They know you won't allow him to skip out of town or miss his court dates. They might insist putting him on house arrest, but I'm really just speculating."

"Bail won't be a problem," Benton responded absently.

"Then my only other advice is to get those two talking. I guarantee that's the first thing whatever lawyer you hire will tell you. The only other person who could testify about what actually happened in that room is dead. The evidence should be enough but it would be a lot stronger with Jonny and Jessie's testimony."

"Thank you, detective."

"You take care of Jonny's bail. I'm gonna go check on Jessie and Hadji," Race said.

The men parted ways, Benton following Detective Dougan to the bail office while Race jogged back through the booking station and down the hall to the room where Hadji and Jessie waited. Two officers stood stoically on either side of the door. Race glanced in to make sure his orders about not entering the room had been followed. Hadji and Jessie were still alone. Neither of them had moved.

Race pushed in through the door. "Everything okay in here?"

Jessie glanced at her father but otherwise said nothing and didn't make any move. Hadji met Race's gaze but merely shrugged.

"How about we get out of here? Benton's posting Jonny's bail right now and then we can go home."

Jessie's chair hit the floor with a bang as she pushed away from the table and her father, screaming the entire time.

"How dare you! How dare you let them do that to him! You should have stopped them! You let them arrest him. You let them just take him and you didn't do anything."

The way Race pinched the bridge of his nose proved that he'd already been through this with his daughter. He let his hand drop and moved cautiously to her crooning, "Jessie, you know it was out of my control."

Jessie didn't let him get any further. She started screaming at him again as she pressed herself to the wall behind her. "That's a lie. Where are you special privileges when we really need them? He shouldn't have been arrested. He-"

An involuntary shudder rippled visibly through her body and she twisted her hands up in the excess fabric of Jonny's shirt. She slid down the wall to sit huddled on the floor while her sobs from her hysterical crying wracked her body.

Race couldn't fight the urge to go to Jessie when she so obviously needed him, even if he knew he'd just be pushed away again, but Hadji stepped into his path before he could get far with an anger in his deep brown eyes that was so uncharacteristic of him Race stepped back again out of surprise.

"Jonny has been arrested?" he asked incredulously and though Hadji didn't raise his voice Race felt exactly the same way as when Jessie had screamed at him.

By the way he stood in a defensive position, Race could see that Hadji was also trying to protect Jessie and wouldn't let Race near her so long as Jessie didn't want him close. He held Race's gaze as he waited for an answer to his question. Race forced his tense muscles to relax as he backed further away.

"Yes," he answered honestly, knowing Hadji would see through any attempt at a lie. Race paused to decide how best to tell the story without upsetting Jessie. No doubt asking Hadji to step outside for a private conversation as he had with Benton was out of the question. Hadji made it clear through his body language that he would not be persuaded to leave Jessie. Nor did Race want to leave her alone.

Race spoke quickly to explain what he could in Jessie's hearing that wouldn't send her even more over the edge. "Jonny's being accused of murder. We're going to plead self-defense but he'll be tried for murder. He was taken into custody at the scene and they're holding him in an interrogation room."

Race watched Hadji's reaction as he spoke. He didn't back down, but Race could see pain and anxiety cross the young man's usually reserved face.

"And who is dead?"

Race's jaw clenched so tightly it hurt his teeth. That identity was not one he wanted to speak in Jessie's presence, but the look in Hadji's eyes said he would be a mountain until his inquiries were satisfactorily answered.

"Zachary Ellis," Race ground out so that the name was barely audible.

Hadji looked noticeably shocked. Jessie flinched and whimpered. Race didn't know if it was because she'd actually heard him despite his efforts to be discreet or if she'd known the name he'd spoken without having to hear it. Either way, Hadji immediately turned and crouched down to her level without approaching her. Race took it as permission to draw nearer, though he gave the pair their space.

Hadji soothed Jessie with his calm voice. "Shhh, Jessie. It is alright. I am sure Jonny is fine. We will see him soon."

Jessie turned her head to look at Hadji with green eyes wide and glittering with fear, though she didn't unbundle herself.

"We need to go, Jessie," Race added gently. "Benton's probably waiting with Jonny right now."

Hadji held out his hand to Jessie. She looked at it a moment then stood with the help of the wall, pressing herself against it as Hadji rose with her. Hadji stepped back when they had both gained their feet to allow her room. Hesitantly she moved forward to follow her father.

Race opened the door and dismissed the officers standing guard. Jessie was skittish around her own family. She was on the edge of hysteria around everyone else.

The guards moved down the hall ahead of Race to clear as much of a path as they could through the booking station while Jessie followed him and Hadji brought up the rear. Getting Jessie through its absolute chaos the first time had been nearly impossible. Hopefully having Hadji there would help with the return trip. Race paused in front of the doorway out of the hall held open by one of the officers. Every police officer in the room was making the effort to make a clear path for Jessie. Race would have to remember to find a way to thank them.

He stepped out of the hallway and moved to one side. Jessie took a very long time to join him, but he waited patiently until she could come to stand next to him. Hadji stepped out last and took the spot on her other side. Jessie shuddered as she took in all the people in the room, but she managed not to run like she had the last time. Race watched her out of the corner of her eye until she nodded and only then did he begin to move forward.

Jessie stayed near without actually touching and Hadji walked along equidistant on the other side. Jessie's eyes flickered around the room madly. Race found himself scanning the room like Zach Ellis wasn't lying on a slab down in the morgue and could jump out of the crowd at any moment. It made the five minute walk through the booking station feel like it took an hour, but they eventually made it to the other side and through the entrance to the front lobby.

The crowd of reporters out front perked up when they saw the three come out from behind the secretary's station. They leaned over the saw horse barricade and rubber-necked around the stationed officers while cameramen brought their equipment to their shoulders and began checking settings and journalists tested their recorders. Jessie turned away from them towards Hadji.

"We cannot leave this way," Hadji commented.

Race addressed the nearest officer, "Is there a back way out of here?"

"Of course. You can use the squad garage. There's a separate entrance from there."

"Who is going through them to get to the car?" Hadji asked.

"I'll distract them if you want to go for it, Race," Benton volunteered as he joined them from down a hallway to their left.

"Where's Jonny?" Race asked when it was apparent the blonde teen wasn't with his father.

Benton sighed. "They won't release him until a judge sets his bail. He'll go to court for it tomorrow."

"You are not planning on just leaving him here alone," Hadji stepped toward his father.

"Of course not Hadji," Benton assured.

"I will stay with you," Hadji said, displaying the same iron as his father in a sign that he would not be deterred.

"I would like that very much."

Race addressed the same officer a second time. "You can take us to that back entrance?"

"I'll use all the back halls so we're less likely to come across many people."

"Then here's the plan. Benton, you and I will go out to address the reporters and once you have their attention I'll get the car and bring it around back. Once you see I'm in the clear you and Hadji can bring Jessie there to meet me."

Race, Benton and Hadji all three shared a look and then Hadji automatically went back to stand guard by Jessie while Benton and Race headed for the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 2/?

Author: Goddess Evie

Date: December 23, 2011

Category: JJHR, Angst

Summary: Jonny and Jessie are definitely NOT okay after their run in with Zach Ellis and the rest of their family are doing their best to help the two.

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Open Door", Amy Lee and Evanescence does. I merely use them to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: Merry Christmas! I hope you all enjoy this update. Not much goes on in these chapters, but sometimes you have to do a little house keeping in a story and that's what this chapter is. I hope it's not too boring. Also, thanks for the reviews I've received. They help me to keep writing! Now please enjoy!

Chapter 2: _Lock the last open door my ghosts are gaining on me._

Jessie began the drive home sitting regularly in the passenger seat, but throughout the long drive she sank lower into the seat and turned away from Race until she had pressed herself into the corner between the door and seat. Race watched his daughter out of the corner of his eye as the frown on his face deepened. Jessie didn't make a sound or say a word during the entire ride and Race didn't press her.

Although it felt like it should be later, the sun was still shining in the late afternoon sky and Rockport citizens and tourists were everywhere enjoying the summer day; especially the teenagers who dreading the beginning of a new school year in just a week. Race sighed and glanced as his daughter as they left the outer limits of Rockport on the highway back to the compound. It should have been the same for Jessie, and Jonathon for that matter. Meeting up with friends, lounging on their private beach, spending as much time as possible with Hadji before he left for college, staying up way too late and sleeping in the next morning. Jessie would've spent all of her free time in the labs with Benton before school took up most of it.

None of that would happen now. Race wasn't even sure if either of them would be fit to attend school when it started. He and Benton were going to have to keep a very watchful eye on the two.

And of course there would be Jonny's trial. Not that Race believed for even a second that Jonny had actually murdered someone. It was ridiculous to think Jonny was at all capable of such evil. That boy had always had an aversion to taking another human life since the death of his own mother to the point where he'd begun to refuse to even touch a gun. Race had seen numerous times the look in Jonny's eyes when Race had been forced to kill someone-anyone-to protect the boy and his family. He didn't complain; he knew it was necessary, but he had a sensitivity to it that Race had always kept in mind.

Race punched the steering wheel and Jessie jumped and whimpered. Race mentally scolded himself as he soothed his daughter, keeping his hands tightly on the steering wheel and under control.

"I'm sorry, Ponchita. It's okay. I won't do that again. I promise. I'm sorry. I just…"

Race sighed. Jessie didn't relax. Race decided perhaps telling his daughter the truth would be the best thing.

"I'm frustrated with myself. I'm just as upset as you are about Jonny's arrest and indictment. And just as mad at myself about it, too. I keep asking myself what more I could've done to keep him out of police custody. Surely there was something I could do. I-" Race paused and pressed his mouth into a tight line. He watched the glittering ocean beyond the highway and wondered how the world could still look so happy and beautiful when his own personal world had suddenly become dark and ugly.

"I'm sorry."

He glanced at his daughter. She'd turned toward him a bit, watching him with the accusations still in her eyes. He knew the apology was not enough, but for the moment he didn't know how to convey his regret and penance to her.

The compound entrance moved toward them on their left. The gates swung open once Iris picked up the sensor in the car. Race turned onto the property without having to pause or wait. Jessie relaxed some and sat up a little once they entered the grounds. Race listened to the hum of the tires over the compound rode and studied the mansion as it slowly appeared over the horizon. Jessie audibly breathed in and sighed once but made no other reaction to returning home.

Race slowed as he approached the house and the garage door opened automatically just as the gates had. Race pulled smoothly into the garage and turned the car off. Neither he nor Jessie moved at first. Race looked around as if he this was the first time he'd seen the inside of the garage before settling his gaze on his daughter.

"Come on. Let's go inside."

Jessica took a deep breath and exhaled as she pulled on the door handle and rolled to her feet out of the car. Race exited on the other side and waited for Jessie to enter first, partially because he didn't want to crowd her and partially to watch how she acted. She'd lost some of her nervousness, but her eyes still flitted to the dark places and she looked over her shoulder constantly.

He followed at some distance through the mud room and into the kitchen. She paused and looked around herself and wrapped her arms around her middle. She glanced over her shoulder again and looked startled when she saw her father. Her gaze lingered on him and Race stood absolutely still while she assessed him. Apparently he passed because she looked forward again.

Race cautiously moved to lean against one of the counters. Had it been just this morning that he'd stood here with Jonny while the young man convinced him to let he and Jessie leave the compound to spend time together, just the two of them? Race didn't regret saying yes to any request as much as he did now as he watched his daughter, Jonny's shirt way too big on her and hanging half to her knees, rediscovering her home with new eyes. If he could just once in his life have prophetic vision, he'd wish for it during that conversation.

Jessie walked out of the kitchen and Race didn't follow. If she wanted to be alone, he would allow her that, and if she wanted company, he would let her come to him on her own. Besides, he needed to call Estella and fill her in on what had happened and perhaps suggest she come spend some time in Maine. Race couldn't think of a time when Jessie needed to have both her parents more.

Jessie appeared in the doorway again. She checked the hall behind her from whence she'd just come then leaned in the entrance. Her gaze swept along the tiled floor but stopped short of her father. She turned out of his sight then only a moment later returned once more.

"I don't-" she began with frustration. Her hands twisted the hem of Jonny's shirt and she worked her jaw in direct imitation of her father. "I'm so mad at you but I can't be alone. I can't-" Jessie rubbed at her eyes and twisted to lean her head against the wall.

"Whatever you need me to do Jessie, just tell me."

Jessie worked her mouth for a moment but couldn't decide what to tell her father so she closed her eyes tightly and shook her head back and forth. Race waited patiently for her to be able to articulate what she needed. At least she could speak, even if she didn't know what to say most the time, which was marginally better than the condition Jonny was in.

"I need a shower," she muttered and slid out of sight again.

Race crossed the kitchen to watch her leave, but didn't follow any further. By the way she moved as she reached the stairs and jogged up them, Race could tell she didn't want him to. He stood watching her even after she had disappeared down the hall towards her room and asking himself how he was ever going to help his daughter. Mad men and megalomaniacs he could handle. They required deliberate and direct actions he could take. This was wholly out of his understanding.

Once he heard the shower running, Race trudged into Benton's personal study and activated the video call option after locking the door. The last thing he needed was for Jessie to come looking for him as he was retelling what had happened to her.

Luckily, Estella was not currently entrenched somewhere in a South American jungle where getting in direct contact took much effort and the right timing. Having recently completed a dig, she had moved her base of operations to the University who'd contracted her to classify and identify the artifacts she'd spent months digging up. Race dialed the number Estella had forwarded to him and listened to the distant ringing from the other end of the line. In only two rings somebody picked up and answered in Spanish. Race answered in kind.

"_I need to speak with Dr. Velasquez. Please tell her Roger is calling._"

"_Dr. Velasquez is currently busy in the artifact room. May I take a message and have her call you back_?"

"_You may go personally find Dr. Velasquez and tell her Roger is calling. This is a family emergency and I need to speak with her immediately_."

The words "family emergency" must have been enough to convince the young man to retrieve Estella because he assured Race he'd only be a moment before Race heard the phone being set down. He waited for close to ten minutes before he heard the sounds of the receiver being handled again and then a series of clicks. A moment later Estella appeared on the screen wearing an anxious expression.

"Roger, what's wrong? Is Jessie okay?"

"Not exactly," Race responded.

He looked at his ex-wife for a moment before he launched into the story, starting from the very beginning: that moment when Jonny had called the hotel room in LA requesting him on the phone. He told every detail without censor and unlike he would've with anybody else, he didn't cling to his stoic façade. Estella listened in silence, though Race rambled through everything so quickly she couldn't have gotten a word in edge wise had she wanted to. By the time he finished Estella's face had gone pale white and she didn't appear to breathing.

"And Jessie and Jonny are…" Estella couldn't finish her question.

Race shook his head. "Jessie needs you, Stell. She's stuck in a house full of men after what happened and I'm at a total loss. Please say you can come."

Estella nodded absently. "It'll take me a day or two to make the arrangements, but I'll be there as soon as I can."

Race sighed in relief.

"Where's Jessie now?"

Race blinked and looked around as he listened to the silence of the mansion. He glanced at the nearest clock to find he'd been on the phone with Estella for an hour.

"I better go check on her."

"Have her call me back. I'll be waiting here in my office."

Race left the office and looked up and down the hallway. The mansion remained quiet, but with the state Jessie was in right now and Benton and the boys still at the police station, that didn't surprise Race. He tuned in to his hearing and detected running water. What could Jessie be doing? She'd gone to shower an hour ago.

Race followed the sound of the water up the stairs and down the hall to his left towards the kids' rooms. The sound of the running water grew louder and he pinpointed it coming from the bathroom. Was Jessie still in the shower?

Race knocked lightly on the door and waited, but got no answer. He knocked a little louder and still no answer.

"Jess? Are you okay in there?"

When Jessie didn't respond, he rapped and called out to her again, but all was silent behind the door except for the water running. Race deliberated for a moment before he reached for the door handle. He twisted it slowly and found it locked. With a quick command to IRIS the look clicked and Race pushed the door open a crack. No steam came out to meet him and the bathroom was empty. Jessie's clothes were strewn on the floor but the towels hadn't been touched. There was no silhouette behind the curtain.

With trepidation Race stepped into the bathroom and called for Jessie so she would know he was there. This time he heard a response, though not one he liked. A whimper came from behind the shower curtain and Race frowned.

"Jessie, it's me. Please let me know you're okay."

This time he heard not a whimper, but sobbing. Race grabbed the curtain and gently pulled it aside. At first he thought the tub was empty, but then he looked down. Jessie lay curled up on the floor of the tub, her red hair streaming in the water, sobbing uncontrollably. Race reached for the faucet and was shocked to find that the jet of water from the shower head was icy cold. He shut the water off quickly and grabbed both towels from the rack, which he laid over his daughter.

Jessie didn't move nor did she stop crying though it was obvious now that she was shivering. Though Race was hesitant to add to her distress, he knew he couldn't leave her like this and hope she came out on her own. As gently as he could, Race pulled his daughter from the tub. She fought him but he didn't give up until she was lying on the bathroom rug instead of in the shower.

Race sat down against the tub and stayed with Jessie until she stilled both her shivering and her crying. Jessie rubbed at her face with one of the towels and peeked at her father. He could tell by the look on her face that she wasn't happy with him, but he would bear it. He would have to.

"Are you okay now?"

She continued to look at him but didn't answer his question.

"What were you doing?"

"Trying to get clean."

Race almost sobbed for his daughter at that answer. He had to look away from her for a moment.

"Why don't you get dressed? I called your mom. She wants to talk to you."

Jessie sat up, adjusting the towels and scooting away from Race as she rose.

"You told her?"

"She needed to know, Jess. She's worried about you. She's going to come for a visit."

Jess looked Race directly in the eyes for the first time since he'd found her sitting on that front step next to Jonny. It didn't last long, but it gave Race hope.

"Go get dressed," he urged gently. "She's waiting to hear from you."

Jessie nodded and rose to her feet as she clutched the towels around her. She wobbled a little but caught herself and Race flinched with the desire to reach out and steady her and the knowledge that he had to give her space until she was ready; a decision only she could make.

He took a moment to pick up her discarded clothing for her and realized that Jonny's shirt was missing. Why she would want to hold onto it, he didn't know, but he wasn't going to press her about it.

Jessie's door was cracked open as Race passed her room and he called to her, "I'm going to get your mother on the phone. She'll be waiting to speak with you."

* * *

><p>Benton stood next to Hadji as they watched Jonny through the two-way mirror sitting silently with the psychologist who was trying again to get him to talk. Dougan used every tactic he could to keep Jonny in the interrogation room and out of the holding cells for as long as possible, though he kept warning his ruses could run out at any moment. Benton had tried to convince Dougan to let him and Hadji see Jonny, but Dougan had admitted that even letting him into the room the first time had been against protocol and he couldn't risk a second time.<p>

"You'll be able to see him when we move him to the holding cells," Dougan assured. "Visits are only half an hour, but it'll give you a chance to be close to him for a little while."

"What happened?" Hadji asked, pulling Benton from his thoughts.

Benton had been expecting and dreading that question from his son. He was surprised it had taken Hadji so long to ask it. Benton looked at Hadji as he tried to figure out how to explain what happened when he himself wasn't completely sure.

"Jessie's stalker..." Benton began.

"Zachary Ellis," Hadji filled in. He said the name like a question.

"Yes. He managed to grab Jessie from the park and isolate her."

"He kept his promises in those letters," Hadji's statement came out as fact and his tone of voice belied his anger and disgust.

"Yes. He was apparently in the process of doing that when Jonny found them. They fought and now Zach is dead."

Hadji said nothing, but Benton could detect the minute changes in his usually calm face to guess what his son was thinking.

"Dougan and Race both think Jonny killed Zach."

"He would not have killed Zach. Not on purpose. He would have stopped Zach at all costs to save Jessie short of killing him. If Zach is dead it is because of an accident and not because of any intentions they assume Jonny may have had."

Hadji was not known for outbursts, even in the most stressful of situations so Benton stared at his son for a moment before he could respond.

"I agree. Accidental sounds a whole lot more plausible than Jonny outright killing him, even if Zach was fulfilling his grotesque fantasies and putting Jessie in danger."

Hadji sighed and looked back at Jonny. "I agree with Jessie. This is not right. Jonny should not be in police custody."

"I hate seeing him like this as well Hadji, but Dougan and Race both assured me this is how such incidents are handled."

"So what is the next step?"

"We're waiting to get in front of a judge to see how much bail is going to be so we can post it and take Jonny home. Then I suspect a lawyer _and_ a therapist. For Jonny and Jessie both."

"I am not sure a therapist will be much help for Jonny. He is too private in such matters."

"I know you are used to being Jonny's confidant, Hadji, and I do doubt the effectiveness a professional will be for him, but we have to try."

Hadji nodded. "I will try as well, if that is okay. If you do not think it will interfere with whatever professional he ends up visiting."

"You'll have no argument from me, Hadji. We'll all try. That way when Jonny is ready to speak he'll know he has plenty of people who are willing to listen."

Father and son fell into silence as they watched Jonny ignore the psychologist trying to communicate with him. His usually vibrant eyes were now a dull blue and wherever he looked it was obvious he was not seeing his immediate surroundings. Benton placed his hand on Hadji's shoulder and gave him a squeeze. Hadji returned the gesture with a grim look.

"I need to call out lawyers. I've put it off for too long as it is."

"I will stay here and let you know if anything changes."

Benton exited the room and pulled out his cell. He had his attorney's office on speed dial and he punched the buttons for it and put the phone to his ear. The lawyers who worked for him were experts in copyright and patent laws, not criminal suits, but Benton hoped they could point him in the right direction. He didn't know who else to call at this point.

After only a couple of rings the secretary picked up and greeted him kindly. Benton identified himself and asked to be connected with his attorney, Geoffrey Grant. Benton counted on the fact that he received priorities for being one of the office's highest paying clients. The secretary didn't support and patched him right through to Geoffrey.

"Dr. Quest!" Geoffrey answered with surprise after Benton had only been on hold for a few seconds. "I wasn't expecting to hear from you. We're still waiting to hear back on your latest patent claims."

"I'm not calling about patent claims, Mr. Grant. I have a much more pressing issue and I need some advice and a recommendation if you have one."

Mr. Grant must have picked up on the serious tone in Benton's voice because he promised to do what he could with solemnity. Benton explained the situation briefly, including only the details about Jonny's arrest and indictment and his desire to prove self-defense.

"You're going to need the best defense lawyer money can buy. I don't know much about criminal defense, but I do know getting a self-defense verdict is very difficult. The courts take these things seriously as they don't want the average civilian thinking they can go around killing people and then claim self-defense. The best defense attorney who deals in criminal law in Maine is Liam Fitzmichael. I have his number here if you'd like it."

"Please," Benton invited and listened carefully to the digits Mr. Grant read to him. His photographic memory instantly memorized the number. Benton thanked his attorney and hung up, then immediately dialed the number he'd been given.

This secretary answered just as cheerfully as the last, but Benton knew he wouldn't be put through to the person he needed to speak to as quickly. He identified himself, hoping perhaps the woman would recognize his name and give him some sort of special treatment, and asked to speak to Mr. Fitzmichael. No go. The woman informed Benton that Mr. Fitzmichael was currently in a meeting and couldn't be disturbed, but would call back as soon as he was available. When Benton tried to find out when that would be, the secretary gave him the run around. Benton left her with his number and tried to convey how important it was Mr. Fitzmichael got back to him immediately. The woman assured him once more that his call would be returned in a timely manner and ended the conversation.

Benton sighed audibly and rubbed at his beard as he pocketed his phone. A commotion behind him caught his attention and he turned around in time to see the door to the interrogation rooms open and Jonny being led through by a couple of officers. Jonny's hands were cuffed behind his back, but he didn't seem to notice. He'd locked eyes with Hadji, who stared back at his brother just as intently. Jonny craned his head around to keep from breaking eye contact with Hadji and Hadji moved to stay in his view, though another officer put out his arms to keep him back.

Hadji gasped when he and Jonny were forced to look away from each other, though Hadji didn't take his eyes off his brother. Jonny spotted Benton, but only looked at his father for a moment before turning his gaze away. The police escorted Jonny down the hall and into the booking station. Benton continued to watch the door until he sensed Hadji beside him. He turned to look at his elder son and was surprised to see such obvious distress in Hadji's face.

"Please, Dr. Quest…father, please, we must help him. This is not right. He needs our help. He needs us."

Benton drew Hadji close. "I know," he replied softly as he felt his son trembling in his arms. He didn't know what else to say.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 3/?

Author: Goddess Evie

Date: December 28, 2011

Category: JJHR, Angst

Summary: Moving slowly along; Hadji finally gets some real face time with Jonny and Jessie really is quite pissed at her father.

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Wonderwall" By Oasis but I do absolutely love the song. I merely use it to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: Not much happens in this chapter and I do feel like I'm rehashing a lot of information, but I wanted to write SOMETHING and keep the story going, so here's chapter three. The most important thing was Hadji actually getting to see Jonny. I am making it my goal to do better at including Hadji in this fic, because I have a tendency to be Jonny/Jessie-centric (imagine that, me, a JJHR writer) and though I can easily weave in their fathers, Hadji seems to be more of a challenge. Hopefully next chapter will be more exciting, but I'm glad I at least have this chapter to offer you.

One last thing before we get started: I am doing a TON of research on the law and court procedures for a murder/self-defense case AND criminal law, but I don't claim to be an expert and don't promise to get everything right. I am doing my best, however, so if something is wrong, I simply ask you to forgive any oversights and to remember that his IS fiction, and fanfiction at that, so give me some slack.

Chapter 3: _There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how._

Benton and Hadji waited to see Jonny sitting in the same room they'd met Race and Jessie in. Dougan had assured them he'd bring Jonny to see them as soon as possible. Benton checked his watch. That promised had been made twenty minutes ago. In another thirty seconds he would go find Dougan and his son himself.

Hadji put his hand on Benton's arm to calm him. "He will come. Detective Dougan has not let us down. He will not fail this time."

Just as Hadji spoke, the door opened and Jonny walked in escorted by two policemen. He wore handcuffs along with the orange jumpsuit but didn't seem bothered by them. Once he spotted his family he watched them with an intensity in his eyes that had been absent before. The guards escorted Jonny to a chair, then retreated out of the room, closing and locking the door behind them. Hadji reached out and placed his hand on his brother's and Jonny looked at their hands together for a long time.

"Jonny, are you okay?"

Jonny breathed in and out, then closed his eyes. He squeezed Hadji's hand with both of his own. Benton leaned back in his chair, not in control of his emotions and having no idea what to say to Jonny.

Hadji leaned in close to his brother and spoke to Jonny in a low voice for only Jonny to hear. Jonny showed he was listening by opening his eyes, though he looked at nothing in particular. Benton only heard a word in every five or six and he made no move to hear their conversation better. He trusted the relationship his sons had with each other and would not interfere.

Benton's vibrating cell phone startled him and he pulled it from his pocket to check it. The number on the screen was the same one he'd dialed for Liam Fitzmichael a half hour ago.

"Boys, I need to take this," Benton apologized.

Jonny merely glanced at his father, but Hadji nodded. "We understand. We will be fine until you return."

Benton knocked on the door to be let out and answered his cell as the door closed behind him.

"Dr. Benton Quest? This is Liam Fitzmichael."

"Yes, Mr. Fitzmichael. I appreciate you calling me back so promptly."

"When the world famous Dr. Quest calls you, you don't waste time calling him back. What is it that I can do for you? People don't call criminal defense lawyers without a good reason."

"It's my son. He's being charged with murder, but we're looking for a self-defense charge."

"That is heavy stuff. Has he had his bail hearing yet?"

"He won't see a judge until tomorrow."

"Can you come see me today?"

"I'm staying at the police station until I can post Jonny's bail and bring him home."

"If the judge even allows him to be released on bail. With a murder charge, it's likely the judge won't even let him go."

"That can't happen, Mr. Fitzmichael. I don't care what it takes. Money is not an issue. Do whatever you have to do."

"I'll come down and see you. We'll get started right away."

"Thank you, Mr. Fitzmichael."

"Expect me in 45 minutes."

Benton hung up and then went to check on his boys. Much like with Jessie, Jonny did not respond to Hadji, but Hadji still spoke to his brother. Benton rubbed his beard, then dialed Race's cell. Race picked up after the first ring.

"How are things going down there, Benton? Anything new happen?"

"I just talked to a lawyer, a Liam Fitzmichael. Our attorney, Mr. Grant, assured me he's the best defense lawyer in Maine. He's on his way to meet with us as we speak."

"I'm checking him out right now. How are the boys?"

"They had to put Jonny in the holding cells, but Hadji and I are utilizing our visitation rights. Hadji's in with Jonny now."

"Has he spoken at all?"

"Not a word. How's Jessie?"

Race sighed loudly. "She's on video conference with Estella at the moment, but I had to pull her out of a freezing cold shower about fifteen minutes ago. She'd been in there an hour."

Benton shook his head. "We need to get a therapist or psychologist for them. They need more help than we can give them."

"I'll look into that, Benton. You worry about Jonny. Looks like Mr. Grant was right about this Liam Fitzmichael. The man's got an impressive record."

"Let's hope he can help Jonny. Will Estella be joining us? I imagine she'll want to be with Jessie."

"It'll be a few days, but she's already making preparations."

"Good. I'll make sure Mrs. Evans knows so she can prepare a suite for her."

"I know you're eager to get back to Jonny and I need to go check on Jessie. Call me if anything develops."

"I will and keep us updated over here as well."

Benton and Race said their goodbyes and then Benton turned back once again to gaze at his sons through the two way mirror.

* * *

><p>Hadji watched his brother very carefully. After seeing the look in Jonny's eyes the first time they'd been able to stand face-to-face, Hadji knew just how seriously the events of the afternoon affected Jonny. He also knew he had to get Jonny talking, but forcing the words out of him would never work. Getting Jonny to talk would be a delicate process and Hadji didn't doubt he played a key role.<p>

"Jonny, I am here for you. When you are ready, you know I will listen. And whatever you have to say you know it will not change how I or our father or even Race or Jessie view you."

Hadji leaned back to note Jonny's reaction, but Jonny stared at the table without any change. Hadji squeezed his brother's hand and continued to speak.

"What I have heard about the events of this afternoon have been all speculation, but I understand that what you did saved Jessie."

Jonny flinched and Hadji paused to see if he would react further, but Jonny didn't move again.

"I do not know if anyone else has said anything, but I hope you know how grateful we all are that you could find her and rescue her. If you had not arrived when you did, well, you know she means a lot to all of us and we all would have done anything we needed to help her."

Hadji hated himself, but he needed to know where Jonny's boundaries currently were. He was definitely reaching them. Jonny shook and the previously neutral expression on his face turned distressful.

"Shhh, Jonny, it is okay. I am sorry. Please just remember that Jessie is safe and that father and I are here."

Jonny's hands had a death grip on Hadji's and Hadji squeezed back. "We are all safe and I am right here. Whenever you need me I am here. I will not leave you. I promise."

Jonny leaned his forehead on their grasping hands and Hadji thought he would cry but he didn't, though he breathed heavily.

"I promise. You know you can talk to me about anything, say anything. When you are ready. I will be here. I promise."

The door opened to admit Benton. Hadji looked at his father with a grim look, his mouth pulled down slightly in a frown.

"You two okay?"

Jonny sat up but didn't look at his father or Hadji. Hadji shrugged. "We are no worse or better than when you left."

Benton took the seat across from Hadji and added his hand to the pile.

"I just spoke with Race. He and Jessie made it home safely."

Hearing Jessie's name got Jonny to react more quickly than anything else. He turned to look at his father with the most life and alertness either Hadji or Benton had seen yet.

"She's fine. She's speaking with her mother, who'll be coming to stay with us. She wanted to see you."

Benton spoke the last statement directly to Jonny and Hadji again carefully studied Jonny's reaction. He didn't move even to breathe as he waited for Benton to say more.

"You can see her for yourself when we take you home tomorrow. I know she's worried about you too."

Jonny nodded though the movement was barely perceptible. He leaned back in his chair, pulling his hands away from Hadji and Benton. Hadji exchanged a look with his father.

"I also spoke to a lawyer who's coming to meet us now. His name is Liam Fitzmichael and he's going to represent us in court."

Jonny bowed his head and Benton stopped talking. Hadji glanced at his father, but Benton gazed at Jonny and Hadji could see he was in deep consideration. Hadji leaned toward his brother again, resting his hand on Jonny's arm, though this time he didn't get any kind of response, and began to speak to him again in soothing tones.

* * *

><p>Race knocked gently before he entered the study where Jessie still conversed with Estella. Jessie looked over her shoulder with alarm then turned back to her mother. Race crossed the room to stand behind his daughter where Estella could see him. The look she gave him after seeing the condition their daughter was in was filled with concern, and Race returned it emphatically.<p>

"Jessie, if you need me for anything, don't hesitate to call. I'll be there in a few days."

Jessie nodded, then rose and walked out of the study without saying goodbye. Race watched her go, then flopped himself into the chair she'd vacated.

"Well?"

"Nothing could have prepared me for that, Race. I've _never_ seen her like that and you guys have been through some pretty scary stuff."

"And we were lucky…until now. Did she tell you anything?"

"She wouldn't say a word about what happened, but she's worried about Jonny. She's not at all happy with his arrest and she's extremely angry with you."

"I know. I'm the only target for her to be angry at right now. Hell, I'm angry at myself."

"Roger, don't. Jessie needs you too much for you to harbor such feelings. Let go of what could have been and just focus on her."

"I will. I promise."

"I'll see you soon."

Estella disappeared from the screen and the screen itself disappeared. Race pulled himself from his seat and went to look for his daughter. He found Jessie sitting on the stairs with her arms crossed over her knees and her forehead resting on them.

"It's been a long day. Have you had anything to eat?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Benton has a lawyer on his way to help Jonny. The very best in the state."

"Good. Maybe he can do what you couldn't."

Jessie rose as she spoke and slipped around her father, leaving him standing speechless.


	4. Chapter 4

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 4/?

Author: Goddess Evie

Date: December 30, 2011

Category: JJHR, Angst

Summary: The lawyer shows up and has a legal discussion with Benton and Hadji while Race checks the news to see how the story is being told.

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Are you Ready?" by Creed but I do absolutely love the song. I merely use it to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: Well, the lawyer finally shows up. I'm starting to regret the name I chose for him, but oh well, too late now. Other than that, don't have much to say except to remind that I'm doing my best to realistically show the legal process for something like this without making it boring so I am doing my research but I don't promise that everything I report via this fic is correct, and plus in order for the story to go the direction I need it to, I do exercise the right to take poetic liberties to achieve the end I have in mind.

Anyways, read, enjoy and review!

Chapter 4: _Hey Mr. Hero, walking a thin fine line under the microscope of life._

Liam Fitzmichael arrived exactly when he said he would. He entered the room where Benton, Hadji and Jonny sat together with a solemn dignity that made a good first impression on Benton and Hadji, though they would reserve their full judgment until they saw the results of his efforts. Jonny made no reaction that he'd even noticed Mr. Fitzmichael had arrived.

After brief introductions, Mr. Fitzmichael got right to work.

"Tell me everything that happened."

Benton related what he knew, which he admitted wasn't much. "My associate Race can give you more information," Benton assured.

"We'll call him later. Tell me about Jonny. How old is he?"

Benton answered every question Mr. Fitzmichael asked about his son. During this time Hadji continued to whisper to Jonny, though Benton didn't doubt his elder son was taking in everything Benton and Mr. Fitzmichael discussed. Benton questioned some of the details Mr. Fitzmichael asked about, but he gave the lawyer the benefit of the doubt and answered everything truthfully.

Finally Mr. Fitzmichael sat back with a long measuring look at Jonny, who hadn't moved an inch. Benton could tell the man was in deep thought and waited patiently for him to come to some kind of conclusion.

"Although this case looks pretty cut and dry, there's possibilities for some pitfalls. I still don't feel like I have a good grasp on the events that led to Mr. Ellis' death."

Jonny jerked at those words but otherwise didn't move. Hadji glanced at Mr. Fitzmichael, who looked appropriately apologetic.

"I'm sorry. I'll be more careful."

Hadji nodded and turned back to his brother.

"If there's anything else I can do to help expedite the process, please let me know."

"I really need to hear the story from Jonny and Jessie."

"I don't know how quickly that can happen. My son is not well. He hasn't spoken a word to anyone."

"And Jessie?"

"She's…fragile. She hasn't been able to bring herself to talk about what happened."

"But she is speaking?"

"Yes."

"You need to understand, Dr. Quest, that both myself and the prosecuting attorney are going to need to take testimony from these two. It's imperative we get them talking."

"We understand that, but this is not something we will be able to force out of them."

It was the first time Hadji entered the conversation, though he'd certainly been listening the whole time, and though Mr. Fitzmichael looked surprised, Benton showed with the look he aimed at the attorney that he stood behind Hadji's statement.

"Get them into therapy right away, Dr. Quest. I can have my office compile a list of the best."

"Please have it sent to my associate Race."

Benton provided Mr. Fitzmichael with the contact information, and Mr. Fitzmichael forwarded it to whatever assistant at his office with instructions via his phone.

"Let's focus on the bail hearing tomorrow. I can assure you whoever is assigned to prosecute will try to have bail privileges revoked since this is a murder case. However, due to Jonny's being a minor with no prior criminal record as well as the Quest family as a whole having a positive reputation in the community and taking into account that we'll be going with the self-defense plea, plus his obvious mental distress, we should be able to get the judge to agree to set bail, though he'll most likely set it pretty high to deter it being posted. If the judge does agree to bail, there'll very likely be some stipulations. Definitely a recommendation to get him help before the trial begins and possibly house arrest."

"I won't stand for it. Jonny has done nothing wrong. In fact, he saved Jessie's life."

"I understand that as I know you do, but we're dealing with murder here, which no one will take lightly. If we're going to go for the self-defense plea, we're going to have to prove that a crime was actually being committed that required Jonny to respond in the way he did. Self-defense law is very tight and if we can't prove that Jonny was acting to protect himself and Jessie, and that killing Zach Ellis was the only way to save them both, then we could be looking at manslaughter as the best case scenario and murder as the worst."

Benton and Hadji both watched Jonny after Mr. Fitzmichael's mentioning of Zach's death. Jonny's eyes had closed and his body became very tense so that he started to shake. Hadji soothed his brother and Benton turned on Mr. Fitzmichael with a danger in his periwinkle eyes.

"I apologize for mentioning the incident, Dr. Quest, I did not mean to further upset Jonny. But we can't keep skirting around what is the central and defining issue in this case. If a crime was being committed, then it strengthens our case, but if we can't prove that, then your son's actions are indefensible."

Hadji spoke again, displaying his talent for remaining calm and defraying heated situations. "What if what happened was accidental? Jonny never intended for events to play out as they did? The end result was pure happenstance and not anyone's intention in the least?"

"That is an interesting question and one we will definitely need to pursue. However, again, only Jessie and Jonny can tell what happened in that room, so until they are able to articulate the events that occurred today, I'll be investigating other avenues of defense and you need to get them professional help."

Benton rested his head in his hands and nodded. "Isn't the simple fact that Jonny and Jessie are so traumatized proof that they were victimized in some way?"

"Yes and no. You can be sure the prosecuting attorney will try to spin it to make them look bad. And even if we can logically show that Jonny and Jessie's outward signs of trauma were the result of some crime committed against one or both of them, we still have to convince the jury that the crime being committed was serious enough to warrant the actions your son allegedly took."

Mr. Fitzmichael patiently waited for Benton to wrap his mind around the information he'd received. He was a little shocked to see how quickly Benton processed the facts that had been covered and accepted the answers the lawyer had given. Then again, Dr. Benton Quest was world-famous with good reason.

"So, what do we do now, Mr. Fitzmichael?"

"We take this one step at a time, Dr. Quest. And the first step is getting through tomorrow's bail hearing. Now I know house arrest is not the best option, but it's better than Jonny being forced to remain in jail during the duration of his trial."

"That'll never do," Benton agreed softly. He watched his sons as he listened to Mr. Fitzmichael.

"We can use Jonny's obvious trauma and mental distress to argue for the need for him to be somewhere safe and where he'll have access to professional help. As I said before, your reputation in the town will be helpful, as there will be no reasonable doubt that you'd let Jonny skip a court date or try to take him out of the reach of the law."

"We want to cooperate fully. I'm not trying to get my son 'off the hook', I'm just trying to prove he did nothing wrong."

"And I will do my damnedest to prove that, Dr. Quest. This I promise."

* * *

><p>"I did receive the email," Race assured Benton over the phone, "and I looked over the list and researched each one. I've already made appointments for Jonny and Jessie to see Dr. Goodwyn in a couple of days."<p>

"Mr. Fitzmichael also asked that you and Jessie go to see him as soon as possible, though he is willing to wait until after Jessie has been to see a mental health professional."

"I'll call and make an appointment for the day after their visit with Dr. Goodwyn, then. Jessie could use a couple of days to get some distance from the event."

"Is being home helping her?"

"The events of what happened are still too fresh for anything to really be of any help," Race answered. "Mostly she wanders around. She'll pop in wherever I happen to be for a moment or two, but then she's gone again."

"We've got a long road ahead of us, old friend," Benton said softly.

"I know it, Benton. We'll get through it, though. We always do."

They ended the phone call. When Race looked up, Jessie stood in the doorway leaning against the frame.

"Was that Dr. Quest?"

"It was."

"How's…everything going down there."

"Benton and the boys just finished meeting with the lawyer."

Jessie nodded and studied her hands.

"Jonny still hasn't said anything, but he's with Hadji and his father."

"That's good. He needs Hadji."

"I, uh, I'm gonna check to see what's going around on the news, right now."

Race meant the statement as a warning. The last thing Jessie need was to be faced with everything that happened that day. Jessie looked around the rec room. Was it just last night that she'd fallen asleep on this very couch with Jonny and Hadji after staying up too late watching movies? It seemed like a lifetime ago that Race and Benton had found them passed out sprawled all over each other.

Jessie disappeared from the door way and Race waited until he could no longer hear her footsteps before addressing IRIS.

"Please compile all news footage from the last twenty four hours mentioning Jonathon Quest, Jessica Bannon, Race Bannon or Dr. Benton Quest."

IRIS chirped that she was working and a few moments later the TV sprang to life with the first of the news stories. Footage of Jonny handcuffed and being pushed into the back of a police cruiser played in the background while the news anchor told of an incident involving Jonathon Quest, son of Dr. Benton Quest and family friend Jessica Bannon. The reporter mentioned the few details that anyone had been able to deduce as well as the death of Zachary Ellis.

The story didn't have a bad spin, per se, but the news channel wasn't making any effort to try to show the family in a positive light. IRIS ended the footage and began to run the next clip. For thirty minutes Race watched reports and breaking news shorts about the incidents at Zach's house. He saw footage of Jonny pushed into the squad car from multiple angles; some of the news outlets had footage of Jessie sitting with a blanket in the back of an ambulance, though all of those clips lasted no longer than a few seconds. Many stories showed shots of the house from further back with the police cars and ambulances, yellow tape and officers working the crime scene. There was even footage of Zach's body being rolled out of the house on a stretcher with a sheet covering him. Benton's very forceful "No comment" from in front of the police station made quite a few news channels' stories.

Once IRIS exhausted the last of the footage, Race leaned back with his hands clasped behind his head and digested the various news reports he'd just watched. Most of them had only reported on Jonny's arrest and Zach's death. None of them had mentioned rape or abduction and all of the reporters had very little to say about Jessie's involvement. Like the first story he'd watched, the majority of the reports had been neutral, seldom had commented on the Quest family's contributions to the community or Benton's philanthropic nature, and one or two had spun what happened to be Jonny's fault, though in an indirect way.

Race sat up when he heard a sound from out in the hall; a sound he recognized instantly. Race's mouth tightened into a frown as he crossed the room and looked out into the hall. Jessie sat in a tight ball against the wall next to the entrance to the rec room. She sobbed uncontrollably into her knees. Had she sat and listened to all the news reports or had she just come back to see her father too early?

Race crouched down. "Jessie? What are you doing?"

"It's not fair. They don't know what happened."

"Nobody really does at this point," Race reminded gently.

"I do," Jessie looked at her father with hard eyes. "I know it wasn't his fault. He was just trying to-"

She couldn't say it. She let her head fall against the wall and looked at the ceiling as tears streaked down her cheeks.

"You shouldn't have been listening," Race told her.

"I just wanted to know what they were saying about him. He doesn't deserve any of it. They weren't there."

"I know, _Ponchita_. Neither of you deserved any of this."

Jessie wiped at her tears and took a deep breath, but she didn't unwrap herself from the ball she had her limbs pulled into.

"Are you sure you're not hungry? I know you haven't eaten all day."

"I can't eat."

"How about we go to bed then? Put this day behind us?"

Jessie finally stood, using the wall for support and Race rose with her and stepped back.

"You promise Jonny can come home tomorrow?"

"As long as the bail hearing goes well tomorrow. I won't lie to you Jessie. It's possible with the murder charge that we won't get bail at all, but the attorney Dr. Quest called is hopeful. We'll just have to wait and see what happens."

Jessie shook her head as she walked away from Race. "He shouldn't even be in jail."

Race didn't respond to the jab from his daughter as she jogged up the stairs to her room. He already knew he could say nothing to temper her anger. He could only hope that Jonny did indeed come home tomorrow and that having him back would lessen his daughter's ire.

Race lingered in the hall only long enough to set IRIS security system's to the highest possible levels-he knew the danger was gone, but he would sleep better that night-before he headed to bed himself.


	5. Chapter 5

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 5/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: April 1, 2012<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Jessie can't sleep and Jonny finally attends his bail hearing.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Jekyll and Hyde", the extremely talented and underappreciated Plumb does. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: Well, with a little nudging from a certain JQ fic author and a needed break from my original fiction, I managed to crank out chapter 5 for you guys. Sorry it took a few months. Life is busy. I hope this inspires some chapters from some other fic writers. You know who you are. *pointed look*

I want to make a note that despite all the research I did into how a bail hearing works, I know this isn't perfect. I did the best I could and tried to at least get the spirit of the proceedings. It's a close as I could get it, so please excuse any glaring mistakes.

Chapter 5: _You remind me of a cigarette. You burn up slowly and then go out like that. You make it harder for me to breathe. You make my head hurt you make my skin stink. So why don't you leave me alone?_

Jessie stood in the middle of her room staring at her bed. Her door stood partly open. She didn't feel comfortable closing it all the way. Like she needed an escape route, just in case. Or to be sure someone would hear her and be able to get to her if... If what? If _he_ attacked again? That wouldn't happen. It was impossible. And yet Jessie couldn't stop looking over her shoulder.

Jessie had changed into her pajamas after her father's suggestion that they both try to rest. Now she was trying to convince herself to climb into her bed.

Whenever she told herself that nothing would happen and she almost had her body persuaded to take the steps forward, her mind would assault her with the image of him looming over her. She'd feel the ropes digging into her wrists, the cold knife blade along her stomach. Her skin would start to crawl all over again and it took her every effort to keep herself from breaking down into uncontrollable sobs again.

She wouldn't cry. She'd done enough of that already.

And she wasn't going to let _him_ win. This was her room. She was safe here. She didn't have to be afraid of her own bed.

Her mind created an image for her of herself tied up on her bed right here in her own room. Trapped, with _him_ touching her, forcing himself upon her. And nobody around to help her.

Jessie gasped for breath and when she finally managed to push the scene from her mind, she found herself on her hands and knees on the carpet, shaking her head back and forth.

She couldn't do it. She couldn't sleep in her own room. She could barely stand to be here long enough to change clothes. It wasn't fair. She shouldn't be afraid in her own home. She shouldn't be afraid in her own bedroom.

Jessie climbed to her feet even as her body still shook. She forced herself to approach her bed only long enough to grab the comforter and a pillow from it.

And Jonny's shirt. She hugged it to her chest with one hand while she dragged the pillow and blanket on the ground behind her.

Before she stepped into the hall, Jessie peeked out to check that the coast was clear. She didn't want to run into her dad. She couldn't look at him without seeing red. The way he'd just let Jonny be arrested like that. When Jonny had needed him most.

Jessie squeezed her eyes shut and pressed Jonny's shirt to her face. Tomorrow. He'd be home tomorrow. Dad had promised.

The hall was empty and the house dark. Jessie shuffled out of her room and to the stairs. IRIS sensed her movement and turned on the lights to night time levels, which meant just enough light to see by and leaving plenty of shadows. Shadows that had never given her cause to worry before. Jessie tried to look everywhere at once even as she reminded herself that the only other person in the house was her father. And that the person who had made her this way was dead.

_Don't think about him. Don't think about that._

Those thoughts became Jessie's mantra as she descended the stairs to the ground floor and turned into the rec room. She sat down on the couch and looked around to either side. Last night she'd fallen asleep here all tangled up with Jonny and Hadji. She tried to recall the feeling of security that she'd taken for granted. That feeling was so foreign now.

Jessie sat up straight when she heard a clicking sound in the hall. She clutched at her bedding as if it could protect her. The clicking sound didn't match her father's footsteps at all. Jessie curled into the couch wishing it would swallow her up as the clicks drew closer to her. She tried to cry out but terror stilled the sound in her throat and all she could do was gasp.

Bandit trotted into the doorway and stood there panting for a moment before he woofed and scampered over to Jessie. He jumped up on the couch and tried to lick Jessie's face. Jessie let him, hugging him to her as she wiped away the tears from her lower lashes.

"Don't scare me like that," she scolded the dog.

Bandit seemed to sense her mood. He lay down with his head and front paws in her lap. Jessie petted his head.

"I bet you miss Jonny too."

Bandit emitted another soft bark as if to confirm what she'd said.

Jessie gave him a few more strokes, then stuffed her pillow at one end of the couch and lay down. Bandit jumped to the floor and curled up next to the couch. Jessie pulled her comforter over herself and hugged Jonny's shirt. She ordered IRIS to turn the lights off and pulled the blanket over her head. Then she refused to think of the events of the day. She couldn't dwell on them anymore. Not today. They exhausted her.

Sleep. She just needed sleep. A reprieve from the memories of what had happened. She couldn't relive them one more time. She prayed for blissful unconsciousness.

Her prayers were not answered. She relived her abduction more vividly in her sleep. Zach was larger; he was everywhere. No matter where she turned or looked, he waited for her. His face distorted grotesquely with an expression of delight for the things he would do to her. Sick things he described to her in a raspy whisper dripping with anticipation even as he began to do them to her.

She couldn't stop him. She couldn't even scream out for help. Her clothes melted off of her. Or had she been wearing any in the first place? She felt his hands on her body and the knife on her skin. Although she knew it was impossible, she swore she could feel him on every centimeter of her body. Nothing else seemed to exist but him all over her. Inside her.

Until Jonny suddenly appeared. Jessie screamed at him to run away. Save himself. Her efforts were in vain. She still could not make any sound. He wasn't paying attention to her anyway. He had eyes only for Zach and his glittering knife.

In one graceful motion, Zach lunged forward, the knife held in front of him. The blade slipped into Jonny's gut before he could move to stop Zach.

Jessie woke up screaming.

* * *

><p>Race awakened instantly at the sound of Jessie's screaming. He could hear Bandit barking madly as well. Working for Intelligence One had made Race a light sleeper and he always would be after those experiences. But nothing brought him more awake out of slumber than his daughter's screams.<p>

Race burst from his room and raced down the hall. He slammed Jessie's door open. His eyes searched the room for her. When he realized the room was empty, Race felt real panic over take him.

Jessie's room spun around him, and he reeled around and stumbled out the door.

"Jessie!"

She only continued to scream in response. Race followed the sound of his daughter's terrified shrieking. Never in his life could he remember her sounding so afraid. He had to get to her. He would kill whoever was hurting her.

He took the stairs three at a time and more by instinct than anything else followed the screaming into the rec room. Jessie sat on the couch tangled up in the comforter from her bedroom screaming and flailing her limbs around like she was trying to fight someone off. Bandit jumped around on the floor next to her, barking still.

Race approached her but stopped short of actually touching her.

"Jessie. You're okay," he chanted to her, but she didn't hear him.

Bandit kept barking and jumping around and Race yelled sharply for the dog to be quiet. Bandit at least listened, crouching away from Race's angry tone but not retreating. He looked back and forth between Race and Jessie. Race ignored him once more to focus on his daughter.

She wouldn't calm down no matter what he said. Finally he grabbed her wrists to stop her flailing arms. He knew she wouldn't want him to, and he tried to be gentle, but he had to get her attention.

"Jessie, look at me. You're safe. No one here but you and me. He can't get you. You're safe."

Slowly Jessie focused on her father. Race watched her as his words registered with her. She gradually calmed down, took in her surroundings and then finally seemed to actually see Race when she looked at him. She blinked away the remainder of the tears in her eyes and then suddenly realized Race held onto her wrists. When he felt her tense, Race let go of her.

"I'm sorry. I just needed to calm you down."

Jessie didn't react. She looked at her hands in her lap as she rubbed her wrists. Race noted the strands of hair stuck to the sweat on Jessie's forehead and neck. Any other time he would have reached forward and brushed them back in place, but now he didn't dare and it killed him. Would his relationship with his daughter always be changed? The thought scared him. Enough for him to wish that Zach Ellis were alive so Race could personally kill him.

Race also noticed Jonny's black shirt balled up in Jessie's lap. As before, he made no mention of it.

"What happened?" he asked, keeping his voice gentle.

"Just a dream."

No need for Jessie to elaborate. Race could easily imagine the kinds of dreams Jessie would have to awaken her so violently. And he could do nothing to protect her from them.

"Why aren't you sleeping in your room?"

Jessie looked to the entrance to the rec room. Her eyes shimmered with fear. "I…just…couldn't…"

Race could see her struggle to explain. "It's okay, Jess."

Jessie's gaze returned to her lap. Race chewed his lip as he considered her.

"Do you want me to stay here with you?"

Jessie looked at him like his question surprised her. She studied her father for a moment, then her eyes darkened and she looked down again.

"I don't care."

Race held in a sigh at his daughter's flippant tone. He looked around the rec room. Bandit still crouched next to him on the ground. Race reached a hand out to the dog and Bandit allowed Race to pet him.

"I'll be right back," Race said.

As he walked from the room he heard Bandit whimper. He turned back to look at the dog. Bandit looked between Race leaving and Jessie wearing an unsure, concerned expression.

"Stay, Bandit. I won't be long."

Bandit sat with his back to Jessie looking ready to guard her from the worst monsters this world could dream up.

_Just as willing to protect her as his master._

Race shook his head at the thought and padded to the nearest closet. He pulled out spare blankets and pillows and returned to the rec room. Neither Jessie nor Bandit had moved. Race spread the blankets out on the floor next to the couch. Bandit trotted between Race and Jessie as if he couldn't decide who to stick by. Race stretched out on his makeshift bed. Jessie soon followed his example, pulling her blanket over her.

"Do you want to keep the lights on?" Race asked.

There was a slight pause before Jessie answered, her voice muffled under the blanket, "It doesn't matter."

Her tone of voice wasn't flippant as before. Just matter of fact. Race pressed his lips together. He shifted to find the most comfortable position and then settled in for what would prove to be a restless for them both.

* * *

><p>After a long night spent in the Rockport police station, Benton was ready to take his sons and go home. At the moment he was running on coffee, adrenaline and parental concern. Hadji had to be going on adrenaline and concern alone, because he'd declined all offers for coffee. Thankfully, because Jonny was still a minor, Benton had been allowed to stay with him the entire night. Of the three of them, Jonny had gotten the most sleep, though Benton guessed it hadn't been very restful. The longest amount of time he'd stay asleep was fifteen minutes before he'd suddenly jerk awake with a look in his blue eyes that scared Benton.<p>

Liam Fitzmichael had shown up bright and early to review the proceedings of the bail hearing and his strategy for convincing the judge to allow Jonny to be released on bail. Benton was frustrated that he'd have to sit as a mostly silent observer and not at the defense table with Mr. Fitzmichael and Jonny. At least he'd have Hadji with him.

"You'll have a chance to speak," Mr. Fitzmichael had promised Benton. "You'll be the main testimony, you and Hadji, on behalf of Jonny's responsibility and citizenship. Things that will convince the judge to allow your son to be released."

Shortly before entering the court room, Benton called to check in with Race. He'd never known his bodyguard to sound so tired.

"Jessie didn't sleep well and so neither did I," Race explained. "Nightmares every time she tried to sleep. And woke up screaming every time."

"I don't know how long we'll have to wait until Jonny gets in front of the judge, but as soon as we're finished here we'll be on our way home." Benton spoke as if the judge granting Jonny bail was a certainty. He couldn't entertain any other possibilities.

"Good. Jonny needs to come home."

"We all do."

Now finally they sat in the courtroom waiting for Jonny's case to be called. Even Hadji fidgeted on the hard bench. Together Hadji and Benton sat in the front row and watched as Jonny and Mr. Fitzmichael entered the court room.

"The court calls Jonathon Blaine Quest," the bailiff called. He read off the docket number for the case as Jonathon stood next to Mr. Fitzmichael at the defense table and a state appointed prosecutor stood at the table across the way.

"What's the charge?" the judge asked as he looked through piles of papers on his desk.

The corner of Benton's mouth twitched. Pay attention! he wanted to yell at the man. This is my son! This is important! Can't you see the condition he's in?

"Murder."

The judge barely glanced up at the word. Jonny shook visibly and Benton feared his for his son. Mr. Fitzmichael spoke to Jonny, Benton couldn't hear what, but the lawyer's words had no effect.

"What does the defendant plead?" the judge asked next, still more interested in his files than Jonny.

Mr. Fitzmichael looked at Jonny again, waiting to see if he would answer. Benton's entire body tensed up and he sensed Hadji was just as anxious sitting next to him. From behind, Benton couldn't see Jonny's face. Was he trying to answer and failing to form words or just standing there with a blank face.

Finally Mr. Fitzmichael addressed the judge himself. "Your honor, since my client has not spoken due to trauma since the incident, I will speak for him. He pleads not guilty."

"On what grounds?"

"Self-defense."

"Very well," the judge responded as if an unresponsive teenager was an everyday occurrence. "Please be seated. Mr. Daniels, please tell me why Mr. Quest should not be granted bail."

Mr. Daniels didn't even look at the file he had open on the prosecutor's table as he addressed the judge and explained the state's reason for wanting to keep Jonny detained. The prosecutor was confident and obviously well practiced in these hearings. Benton couldn't imagine anyone could have very solid reasons for keeping Jonny detained, but as he listened to Mr. Daniels, he began to seriously worry that Mr. Fitzmichael would not be able to convince the judge to release Jonny.

"Please breathe father," Hadji whispered to Benton, placing his hand on his father's arm.

Benton nodded and forced himself to take a breath. How Hadji could remain so calm at a time like this Benton could not explain except to chalk it up to the yogi training Hadji put himself through. He was grateful for his son's reassuring presence.

Mr. Daniels argued for the seriousness of the charge and how someone who had possibly committed murder, even a minor, should surely not be allowed to go free. He also used the uncertainty of the events surrounding the incidents and the lack of details as arguments for keeping Jonny detained. It all sounded very plausible.

Throughout Mr. Daniels' address, Jonny continued to shake violently, even flinching every time the word "murder" was spoken. Mr. Fitzmichael did his best to calm Jonny, but he had no luck getting through to the boy.

"Thank you Mr. Daniels," the judge commented once the prosecutor finished. He looked to Jonny and Mr. Fitzmichael at the defense table. "Mr. Fitzmichael?"

"Thank you your honor," Mr. Fitzmichael stood, though he remained behind the table.

Mr. Fitzmichael addressed the vagueness of the details of the incident, responding to Mr. Daniels arguments first. As Benton listened to the defense attorney, he began to calm. Where Mr. Daniels had made the lack of details concerning Zach's death look bad for Jonny, Mr. Fitzmichael turned it around to show how a lack of evidence meant a lack of reasons to keep Jonny in custody.

"Furthermore, as it is quite obvious that Mr. Quest has been traumatized by the events and needs to seek medical help and the support of his family, I feel it best that he not be detained in the jail where his condition could be worsened. Not to mention the outstanding record and reputation Jonathon holds within the community. If it please the court, I would like to call on Jonathon's father, Dr. Benton Quest, and his brother, Hadji Singh, to speak in his behalf."

The judge nodded his consent. Mr. Fitzmichael turned and nodded at Benton and Hadji to stand.

"Benton," Mr. Fitzmichael invited.

"Your honor, my son has never been anything short of reliable and responsible. He not only has top grades in his class, but has advanced to a grade level beyond peers his age. He has been involved in many community service volunteer programs that have benefitted Rockport and its citizens. And I personally guarantee that he will make every court appointment without fail."

Benton held back the urge to plead the judge to let his son come home. Mr. Fitzmichael had warned that any attempts for pity would not be well met. And so Benton called on his long experiences as a scientist and philanthropist to remain professional before the judge.

"Mr. Singh," Mr. Fitzmichael nodded to Hadji.

Hadji didn't repeat what Benton had said. Instead he attempted an appeal on Jonny's behalf. "Your honor, my family is not, unfortunately, unacquainted with dangerous situations or harsh realities. However, never have I seen my brother respond to those incidents as he has to this one. He is a resilient and optimistic young man. The depth of his trauma, so debilitating that he cannot even speak, proves how deeply he is affected. Please allow us, his family, the chance to help him heal so that he may tell the story of the events with his own voice."

Hadji's heartfelt plea was the first thing that seemed to truly get through to the judge. He'd finally stopped rifling through papers and had looked at Hadji as he'd spoken. Hadji held the judge's gaze, though Benton couldn't tell how the judge was responding. Mr. Fitzmichael signaled for Benton and Hadji to sit and then took his own seat.

Benton couldn't take the waiting. He closed his eyes and held on to Hadji's hand. The silence seemed to stretch for an eternity before the judge issued his decision.

"Jonathon Blaine Quest will be released into the custody of his father with the promise that he will not leave Rockport for the duration of the trial. He will make arrangements for Jonathon to receive professional help."

Benton exhaled in relief and relaxed for the first time since Race had called him the day before. Hadji uttered a small prayer of thanks.

Mr. Daniels spoke up quickly, to request that Jonny be put on house arrest at the very least. Mr. Fitzmichael fired back a quick retort, arguing that with Jonny's perfect record and the Quest family's shining reputation in the community, surely house arrest was not a necessary measure.

The judge paused as he considered the amendment. "Due to the seriousness of the charge, I will agree. Jonathon Quest will be on house arrest until further notice."


	6. Chapter 6

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 6/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: April 1, 2012<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Benton, Hadji and Jonny arrive home.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Change" Evanescene does (if you haven't noticed by no, I totally love this band). I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Chapter 6: _Thought that I was strong; I know the words I need to say. Frozen in my place, I let the moment slip away._

Benton exhaled a relieved sigh once he maneuvered his car through the gates of the Quest Compound. If only he could truly leave all that troubled his family outside those gates. But Jonny, sitting in the back seat with Hadji, wasn't going to just start talking again. Nor would the tracker that had been placed around his ankle magically disappear.

Benton pulled the car to a stop outside the mansion, but sat for a moment before exiting the car. He wouldn't exactly call the thoughts that ran through his head a prayer. Just hope that being home meant that life for everyone could return back to normal. Benton glanced at his sons in the rear view mirror. Maybe Jonny could find the words he needed to say in the safety and familiarity of his home. And that Hadji could help find peace for his brother and in doing so find peace for himself.

Hadji and Jonny didn't budge when Benton came around and opened the door for them. Jonny stayed where he was, lost in his thoughts, until Hadji nudged him. When Jonny stepped out of the car, Benton pulled his son under his arm and held onto him. He pulled Hadji to the other side and walked into the house with his sons on either side of him.

Race awaited them in the front entrance. He looked even worse than he'd sounded on the phone.

"Welcome home."

His greeting lacked its usual warmth. His eyes strayed to Jonny's ankle where the tracker blinked. Race shook his head and grumbled something to himself, but Benton couldn't hear what.

"Mrs. Evans is here. She's got some breakfast if you guys are hungry."

"That sounds nice," Benton tried to sound cheery but the effort was lost on the boys.

Hadji tried, though. "Come, Jonny. Let us go see what Mrs. Evans has prepared."

With a hand on Jonny's arm, Hadji led his brother from the front hall towards the kitchen. Benton moved to follow them, but Race stopped him.

"Isn't some officer supposed to be here to get that thing set up?"

"It's completely GPS run. State of the art. They'll know where Jonny is no matter where he goes."

"How were they able to afford that?"

"With some recent generous donations."

"Generous donations from Quest Enterprises?"

Benton rubbed at his face. He didn't want to think about the cruel irony of that statement. Fortunately, Race knew him well enough to change the subject.

"I've already talked to Mrs. Evans. I let her know the best thing she can do is act normal and not mention what happened around the kids at all."

Benton nodded.

"You left behind quite the party at the front gate. How long do you think the reporters will camp out before they realize it's pointless?"

"Hopefully no more than the afternoon. I want them gone before we have to take Jonny and Jessie to see Dr. Goodwyn. There's no way I'm letting any reporters near them right now. They're both too sensitive still."

"I agree. We'll call the police to clear them out if we need to."

"How's Jessie? I thought she'd be here waiting when we came in."

"I did too. She watched from the front window all morning, but when IRIS announced your arrival, she disappeared. Don't know where she went."

"Perhaps she's already joined the boys," Benton suggested.

"Might as well go check. Now that Jonny's home, maybe she'll finally forgive me," Race commented with a sigh as the men followed Jonny and Hadji's path.

"It'll pass. Jessie could never stay mad at you."

"I don't know, Benton. She seems pretty determined."

"She's also been through a lot in the last twenty four hours. She's got so much to deal with. Give her time."

"I'm just not used to keeping my distance in situations like this."

"We've never had a situation like this."

"You know what I mean, Benton."

The men let their conversation lull as they approached the entrance to the kitchen. When they turned in Jonny and Hadji sat together at the bar with bowls of hot cereal in front of them. Hadji ate from his at a slow pace, but the most Jonny did was stare.

Jessie was nowhere in sight.

"You should eat, Dr. Quest," Hadji invited, rising to fill a bowl from a pot on the stove.

Benton started to protest, but Race cut him off in a voice low enough so the boys wouldn't hear.

"Eat, Benton. Starving yourself won't help and you need to set an example for Jonny."

Benton didn't argue. He took the seat on the other side of Jonny while Hadji sat the bowl and a spoon in front of him. Although eating was the last thing Benton felt like doing, he forced himself to for Jonny's benefit.

Jonny didn't even seem to notice he was there.

Benton shared a worried look with Hadji over Jonny's blond head as they ate their breakfast.

"Good, you're eating," Mrs. Evans cheerily greeted as she entered the kitchen. "I imagine it's the first good meal you've had in the last day."

"Yes, thank you, Mrs. Evans," Benton responded, finding a smile for the woman.

He kept an eye on Jonny to see how he would react, but he didn't at all.

"Why don't you go somewhere more comfortable and I'll clean up in here."

"We'll get out of your way," Race assured.

He and Benton waited in the doorway for the boys to join them. Hadji touched Jonny's arm to get his brother's attention. Jonny looked at him as if coming out of a dream. Hadji indicated Race and Benton waiting for them with a look in their direction. Jonny followed his brother's gaze, then looked back at Hadji.

"We are going to get out of Mrs. Evans way," Hadji explained.

He pulled Jonny from his stool and across the kitchen. Benton watched with his jaw tight and his heart constricted. He felt Race's hand on his shoulder and tried to remind himself that this wouldn't last. It couldn't last.

Jonny allowed himself to be led along by Hadji behind Benton and Race as they moved through the house. Race tried to convince Benton that he should take some time to shower and maybe get some rest. Benton shook his head at his friend. Such habits seemed like luxuries and unnecessary ones at that. They would take him away from Jonny. He didn't want to be away from his son. From either of them. They needed him so badly right now.

"Jonny?"

It wasn't the worry in Hadji's voice that made Benton whip around to face his sons. Hadji hadn't not sounded worried since he'd laid eyes on Jessie in the police station. It was the tinge of fear Benton heard in his elder son's voice.

Hadji watched Jonny as if he wasn't sure what Jonny was going to do. This was not exactly a foreign state of being for Hadji. He often joked that Jonny should be pictured under the definition for impetuous in the dictionary. No, it went back to the fear again. Hadji was _afraid_ of whatever Jonny might do next.

Jonny stared very intently up the stairs.

Benton followed his son's gaze. His eyes widened when he saw Jessie standing at the top of the staircase staring back down at his son. Jessie had one hand on the newel post. She raised the other to her mouth with the fingers slightly curled.

Although a range of emotions crossed her face, Benton couldn't identify one that indicated she was glad to have Jonny home.

"Jessie." Race addressed his daughter like Benton would've approached a frightened animal.

Jessie turned and fled.

Benton's gaze flashed back to his sons. Jonny looked like he was having a hard time breathing and Hadji was doing his best to calm his brother. Jonny made a guttural sound, and Benton thought he might say something. He hoped Jonny might say something. In fact, he would definitely call this praying.

Hadji hugged his brother, though Jonny didn't return the gesture. When Hadji looked at Benton with a look of utter helplessness, Benton stopped praying and stepped forward to pull both his sons into a tight embrace.

* * *

><p>Race watched Benton hold onto Jonny and Hadji and then glanced up at the spot where his daughter had been standing. What had gotten into her? About the only thing she'd talked about the past twenty four hours had been Jonny coming home. Now that he was home, why had she run away?<p>

Race had almost gone after her before, but he'd gotten so used to holding himself back that he stopped himself. He didn't stop himself from going after her now.

He took the steps two at a time and headed left after Jessie. He checked her room first. It was empty. No surprise there. He continued down the hall but stopped again after a few steps. He had no idea where Jessie might have stashed herself away and the compound offered dozens if not hundreds of hiding places.

"IRIS," Race spoke softly but he knew the system would hear him. "Please locate my daughter."

IRIS chirped back at him immediately, "Jessica Bannon is in the billiards room."

_With the knife._

Race erased that thought from his mind and followed the hall around the corner. He spotted the cracked open doors of the room IRIS had indicated. Race pushed one of the double doors wider open and stepped halfway into the room.

He didn't have to call out for Jessie even though the room looked empty. He could hear her soft crying. He said her name anyways so she would know he was there. No sense in startling her.

"Go away."

She still sounded mad. Jonny's homecoming hadn't changed that.

Race stepped further into the room and began looking around for where ever Jessie had hidden herself. "Jessie, why did you run away from Jonny?"

No answer, although there was a telling hitch in her crying. Race moved around the pool table and almost tripped over his daughter. He stepped back again but she hadn't noticed him. She had her knees pulled to her chest with her arms folded between them.

And she had her face buried in Jonny's shirt.

Race crouched down to her level. "Jessie,"he said her name firmly.

Jessie turned to look at him with all the vitriol she could muster pouring from her tear-brightened green eyes.

Race would not be deterred, though he proceeded with care. "Why did you run away from Jonny?"

At that question all the anger and the hatred left her expression. "I…couldn't…"

Much like last night, Jessie was unable to formulate her answer into words. She lifted her face to look at the ceiling. "I-he-"

This time, however, Race couldn't guess at what it was daughter was trying to say.

"Hey, Jess. C'mon, it's me. You can tell me."

Jessie looked at her father again wearing a frown that said she so desperately wanted to tell him. That she'd tell him if only she could figure out exactly how to say what she wanted to say.

Race nodded at her and she looked at the tear stained shirt in her hands. He could see she was contemplating its owner, but what her thoughts were concerning that subject was a complete mystery.

* * *

><p>Race found Benton later in his study staring at his desk and looking like he might face plant into the pile of papers on it from exhaustion.<p>

"Where are the boys?" Race asked and Benton jerked up to look at him.

"Upstairs. Hadji wanted to help Jonny get cleaned up and changed."

A beat of heavy silence passed between the two men before Benton remembered to ask, "And Jessie. Did you find her?"

Race nodded as he sank into one of the chairs in front of Benton's desk.

"Did she say why she ran away from Jonny?"

Race pushed a hand through his hair and shook his head. "She tried, but…she's still finding it hard to talk about…"

Benton sat up straighter and sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm being insensitive. Is she okay?"

"She's about as okay as Jonny is, so, no."

"How are we going to handle this, Race? I've never felt at such a complete loss to help my sons."

"I know, but we'll get through this the way we always do. One step at a time, working together."

"It's just that Jonny-I don't think he was even this was bad when his mother…"

"Whoa, don't go there, Benton. I can't hold this family together by myself. I need you on this."

"Right."

Race watched as Benton composed himself, transforming before his very eyes. Taking a moment to mentally prepare himself, Benton's resolve not to lose control showed in his face. When he finally met Race's eyes, that hopelessness that had nearly led him to a break down moments before was gone.

"So what's the plan?"

"I'm going to keep a close eye on security. Although the physical danger has passed, Jonny and Jessie are extremely fragile right now. I'm hoping they'll take some comfort in knowing that I've got the security levels set all the way up. Even Mrs. Evans can't enter the grounds without one of us manually letting her in.

"I'm also going to continue to monitor the news channels. We'll be better off if we know what the world is saying and hearing about us. And when we do finally go public, we'll be better prepared to respond to whatever they throw at us."

Benton pressed his mouth into a tight line for a brief moment. "I'll stay in touch with Mr. Fitzmichael. Stay updated on the case and give whatever help I can to beat this murder rap."

"The only other thing we can do is be there for our children. Let them know we're here for them. Jessie hides away from me most of the time, but when she does show up, I just try to let her know I'm there for whatever she needs."

"I'm glad they have Hadji. He seems to be able to get closer to both of them than either of us can. I just worry he'll take this whole burden upon himself."

"We gotta be strong for all of them, Benton."

_Author's Notes: There are many reasons this new chapter took so long. Only one is that I couldn't work out Jonny's homecoming (and reuniting with Jessie) in my head satisfactorily. No matter how I manipulated it or reworked it, it just felt wrong. And then I realized that what I originally planned wasn't the way the scene was supposed to go at all and how it really needed to happen and I was finally able to write this chapter._

_I know. Not the homecoming everyone was looking forward. Even I was looking forward to the happy homecoming (at least on Jessie's side), but it just didn't work. When I realized it needed to happen as I wrote it, it all fell into place._

_So, please don't hate me. Sometimes the scenes have a mind of their own and I am merely the slave to their whimsy._

_And I would be amiss if I didn't thank everyone for their very kind reviews. I try to respond to each one individually, but in case I missed somebody: Thank you. From the bottom of my heart. You are all wonderful, fantastic people. I hope you review other stories you like as kindly and eagerly as you review mine._


	7. Chapter 7

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 7/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: June 8, 2012<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Another sleepless night. Time to go see the therapist.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "perfect", it is owned by Flyleaf. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: I am so on a roll! Or I'm really addicted to getting praise from you guys. ^_^ Sometimes I forget that if I start writing a chapter, something, eventually, will come. And since I have SO MUCH TIME right now, I can do that more often and get you guys more chapters. I told myself that I would get into the actual therapy sessions no matter how long this chapter ended up being, but then found a great stopping point, so those will be next chapter.

Chapter 7: _And how can you look at me, when I can't stand myself._

Race was used to early mornings, but usually after a decent night's sleep. For the second night in a row, Jessie refused to sleep in her room. She changed into her pajamas and then dragged her blanket, pillow and Jonny's shirt down to the rec room. This time Race checked on her, and when he asked if she'd like his company tonight, she nodded at him though she'd been looking elsewhere. The empty look on her face told that she wasn't looking forward to another night of sleeping.

Or more specifically another night of dreams.

Race made his makeshift bed on the floor by the couch. Bandit was nowhere to be seen, but Race guessed that the little dog had picked up on Jonny's traumatization and was probably sticking close to his master.

Despite knowing that he was absolutely exhausted, Race couldn't fall asleep. He was waiting for Jessie's nightmares to start, but he also couldn't stop thinking about Jonny and the murder charge. And Benton bringing up his wife. Where had that come from? In the nine years Race had lived with the Quests, this made no more than half a dozen times that Rachel Quest had ever been mentioned. It showed just how worried Benton truly was.

Race suddenly realized he'd failed to call Estella that day to check on her progress. He'd been too wrapped up in Jessie and Jonny and trying to keep an eye on the news, both on the actual reporters camped outside the main gate and the stories airing on the news stations (without Jonny or Jessie seeing), and keeping up with Mr. Fitzmichael's updates via Benton.

Race really would have liked to sleep. After learning to get by on catnaps on some pretty high risk missions before ever meeting the Quests, he thought nothing could ever keep him from sleeping, but he'd been proven so wrong by one ordinary boy.

Not for the first time Race hoped Zach Ellis knew just how lucky he was to be dead already.

The first of Jessie's nightmares woke her screaming and clawing at the air around her later than Race would have guessed. She must have been fighting sleep to avoid them. He was up beside her in a flash, trying to talk her down from her visions with words only at first, and when that failed, by gently holding her wrists only long enough for her to see her true surroundings. He let go the instant he saw the recognition in her eyes.

After a moment her gaze drifted to her father as he continued to softly comfort her with soft shushing. She met his eyes with her own watery stare for only a moment before it locked onto something behind him and she instantly pulled her blanket up to her chin and looked away from whatever she saw.

That was when Race realized that he hadn't been the only one to react to Jessie's agonized screaming. He turned around to the sight of Jonny standing in the doorway looking ready to kill someone. Literally looking capable of killing. Race never thought he'd ever think that about Jonny. Jonny who had always shied away from killing, even when it would have been justified. That Jonny now stood with his fists clenched, his eyes darting around the room, his mouth pressed into a line so tight his lips were almost completely hidden and his broad shoulders moving up and down in rhythm with his exaggerated breathing.

Hadji and Benton stood on either side of him, trying to calm him. Bandit trotted around behind him, distressed and unsure what to do, but ready to jump into action should his master need him.

Then Jessie whimpered, "Make him go away, please."

Race hoped Jonny hadn't heard that. Or Benton and Hadji for that matter.

Race crossed the room to Jonny and with a hand on his chest tried to push him out of the rec room. Jonny wouldn't budge. In fact, he looked at Race like he'd tear his body guard apart without a second thought in order to keep Jessie safe. Race shared a glance with both Hadji and Benton, but both looked as helpless to diffuse the situation.

Race stared Jonny straight in his blue eyes and stated, "Jonny, listen. Jessie is fine. She's not being attacked. No one can get to her. I set the security system to its highest levels."

Jonny didn't back down and Race wondered if the boy had even heard him. In this state, so focused on Jessie and her safety, were Race's words even registering with him? Jessie whimpered again, audibly for all four men to hear, and Jonny leaned forward towards her. Race pushed him back again, managing to deter his forward momentum even if he couldn't get him to back away.

"It was just a dream, Jonny. She's reacting to a dream."

Jonny's eyes spasmed and for a moment he actually seemed to see Race.

"She just needs her space. Can you give that to her?"

Race watched Jonny's gaze as it flickered between him and Jessie behind him curled up on the couch and trying to shield herself with her blanket. After a tense 30 seconds during which Race was afraid he was going to have to physically remove Jonny from the vicinity-something he'd like to avoid for Benton and Hadji's sake as much as for Jonny's-Jonny finally relaxed. He closed his eyes and allowed his father and brother to pull him away, though not without looking over his shoulder in the direction of the rec room the entire time. Bandit followed, eyes only for his master.

Race turned back to Jessie and approached her.

"You okay Ponchita?"

"No. I can't do this."

"Hey, you'll get through this. Just like you always do."

Jessie shook her head. "I can't fight this." She started crying.

Race didn't respond. He knew exactly how she felt. Any bad guy that came after her he could punch or shoot. But how did you fight off a nightmare or the memories that caused them?

Race settled himself on the floor with his back against the couch. He stared at his hands as he thought about what he could say to his daughter.

"This is merely a different kind of fight," he finally said.

"So, what, there's some kind of mental judo you can teach me?"

Her remark came out biting, almost accusing, but Race didn't let it affect him. He was starting to get good at not taking her cruel remarks personally.

"I can't teach you that. But perhaps when you see Dr. Goodwyn tomorrow, she can help."

Race turned his head to look at Jessie. She'd been watching him, but she averted her eyes. She made no response to what he'd said. After a moment she turned on her side and pulled her blanket over her shoulder to block him out.

"Race?"

Benton stood in the doorway. Race rose and joined him out in the hall. Benton paced for a few moments to collect his thoughts. Race stood absolutely still as he waited for the doctor. Eventually Benton came to a stop just in front of Race. He spoke in hushed tones, afraid of what ears might be listening.

"The next time Jessie wakes screaming from another nightmare, we're gonna have the same situation. And every time she wakes screaming."

"I know. It'll probably be best if we keep them as separated as possible for the night. And you and Hadji should stay with him. That way you can intercept him a little quicker and keep him away."

"We intercepted him at the top of the stairs," Benton stated incredulously. "It didn't do much good."

"Make up a room for yourselves up on the third floor on the other side of the house. Initiate IRIS' soundproofing technology. Do whatever you have to do to keep him from hearing her. Otherwise they're both just going to get even more agitated each time it happens."

"Even with the state he's in, he still wants to protect her," Benton commented absently.

Race raised his eyebrows at the doctor. He feared how close to home that realization was striking. He decided to steer Benton away from that train of thought.

"We're just going to have to hope that Dr. Goodwyn is as good as we've been led to believe."

Benton didn't answer, so Race added.

"You ready for a long night?"

This time he got Benton's attention. The man glanced at Race as he pulled his mouth in tight in direct imitation of Jonny. Then Benton turned and headed up the stairs and to his sons.

* * *

><p>At the first sign of light Jessie decided she was done trying to sleep and thus so did Race. Jessie sat up on the couch nestled in her blanket and grabbed the remote for the TV. Race left the room and as soon as he was out of Jessie's range of hearing ordered IRIS to block any news channels and shows. Then he headed to the kitchen where he started a pot of coffee and sat down with a laptop to check the compounds security system.<p>

Everything was running smoothly. The news teams had left and Race prayed they'd stay away. He agreed with Benton. The last thing Jonny and Jessie needed was a bunch of aggressive reporters shooting questions at them without any care to the damage they were causing. And Race meant what he'd said in response. He'd call Detective Dougan to have the police come clear them out.

Race checked for any perimeter breaches next. Of course, anything even half the size of an average human would've set off the alarms immediately, but Race checked all the same. Apparently some of the news vans had stayed pretty late into the night because they were plenty of pings at the front gate and surrounding area. A few more from along the beach and cliff faces, which Race chalked up to sea gulls. Nothing he saw raised an alarm.

Before shutting down Race initiated a call to Estella. He quickly calculated the time difference as the phone rang, afraid he'd wake her in the middle of the night. Then he realized that she wouldn't care.

"Sorry I didn't call you yesterday, Stell," he opened with when she answered. "Jonny came home and things were…hectic."

Estella looked relieved to see his face. "Not gonna lie, Roger, I was worried. But I understand. How's Jessie? And Jonny? And everyone?"

"The only thing that's different is that we're all extremely tired on top of everything else."

Race took a moment to detail Jessie's nightmares and her reactions to them along with the effect it had on Jonny.

"Luckily, whatever precautions Benton took worked. Jessie woke up screaming another half dozen times at least, but Jonny didn't come running."

Estella stared at Race with her hands gripped together. "How did Jonny's homecoming go? Did that help at all?"

"It made things worse, actually. All Jessie could talk about was Jonny coming home. And she was so mad at me that he'd been arrested. But when he finally arrived, she ran away from him and she refuses to be anywhere near him. Benton and I haven't the slightest clue why she's so…afraid of him."

"And we won't until she's ready to talk about it."

"Well, they're going to see the therapist this afternoon."

"Don't expect miracles, Roger. It might be a while before either of them are able to talk about it."

"We're just hoping to get Jonny to say anything," Benton cut in from where he was pouring himself a cup of coffee.

He moved to stand behind Race so Estella could see him and handed Race a full mug as well.

"You two cannot survive on coffee alone," Estella scolded immediately. "You need to eat. On a regular basis."

"Mrs. Evans has made it her sole focus to keep us all well fed," Race assured.

"Or at least fed. I don't know about the well part, but she does her best," Benton amended, then immediately asked, "How soon will you be able to get here?"

"It'll take a good day of flying. There's no commercial flight straight from Peru to Maine."

"Then scrap the commercial flights. I'll have one of the Quest jets sent out to get you."

"Thank you, Benton," Estella replied reverently.

Benton nodded. "I'll go get that taken care of right now. I'll email you the itinerary. See you when you get here."

Benton walked out.

"Sometimes I forget just how strong that man is," Estella commented.

"You want to talk to Jessie?" Race asked.

"She awake?"

"More often than not. Hold on. I'll get her."

Race jogged back to the rec room to let Jessie know her mother wanted to talk to her. Jessie climbed out of her blanket cocoon, but she held Jonny's shirt behind her back as she followed Race back to the kitchen. Usually Race allowed his daughter her privacy when she talked to Estella, but now he lingered, refilling his coffee cup, acting as if he were scrounging for breakfast. Neither Jessie or Estella chased him away.

Estella did most of the talking. Jessie's answers were all short. Still they were answers. Estella kept the conversation on safe topics, which meant it didn't last long. In less than ten minutes Jessie bid goodbye to her mother and left the kitchen.

Race took her seat. "Get here soon."

"As soon as possible."

* * *

><p>Calling the police ended up being necessary. The local news teams returned early in the morning and they were joined by crews from some of the national news sources. Race was honestly surprised it had taken the national crews so long to show up. Detective Dougan came out with the squad to run the news crews off and also headed the police escort into town.<p>

Race drove separately with Jessie. More than the fact that she refused to be anywhere Jonny was, Race didn't think she'd handle being in such a small space with the whole family. She didn't even sit up front with Race. She shoved herself into the corner of the back seat opposite the driver side, hugging Jonny's shirt.

Race followed Benton and the boys in the Quest van. Police vehicles with their lights on preceded and followed them. Race constantly checked his mirrors both to keep an eye on his surroundings as well as on Jessie.

The drive took too long. Navigating through town with such a caravan slowed them down. Race didn't complain, though. He figured Detective Dougan was doing everything he could now since he'd been unable to stop Zach. At least Race knew that's how he'd feel in that position.

"I'll stay here with a couple of squad cars in case any reporters try to get at you here," Dougan told Race.

Race shook his hand and thanked him, and then ushered Jessie inside behind Benton, Hadji and Jonny. Jessie kept her distance from the three men ahead, but once they entered the waiting room of Dr. Goodwyn's office, she stopped and turned towards her father.

"Can we just wait out here?" she asked, her feet fidgeting as she stared at the carpet.

"I think we should go inside and wait with everyone else."

Jessie glanced over her shoulder into the waiting room. Specifically she glanced at Jonny. Race saw Jonny glance at her after she turned away.

"I don't think I can."

"Nobody in there's going to hurt you Ponchita."

"I know that!" Jessie raised her voice then immediately curled in on herself when she realized the attention she'd just drawn to herself.

Benton, Hadji and Jonny were all looking at her, Jonny sitting on the edge of his seat. Even the secretary was eyeing Jessie, though with a look from Race she found something to busy herself with.

"It's not that," Jessie whispered.

Race found himself facing a conundrum. A part of him wanted to forget all else and just let his daughter do whatever made her feel safe. After what she'd been through, it was hard not to do just that. But he couldn't ignore Jonny's trauma, and by extension Hadji and Benton's concern.

_Can't you see that boy needs you? He saved your life. If not for him, we wouldn't be sitting here having this conversation. Now help him._

Race hadn't let his mind even get near those thoughts and they nearly shook him to his knees. If he hadn't been holding onto the door already, he may not have had the strength to keep standing.

"Why don't we wait for the doctor over there then," Race pointed to second seating area on the opposite side of the waiting room from the Quests. Jessie closed her eyes and Race saw the shudder go through her body, but then she turned and walked straight towards the arrangement of sofas and chairs Race had indicated. She immediately laid down on the sofa and Race frowned.

He took the chair next to her and looked over to the Quests. He shared a frown with Benton and then tried to give a reassuring smile to Hadji. He wouldn't call it a successful attempt, but then he knew Hadji would be no less comforted by it. Finally he tried to catch Jonathon's eyes to share a silent sentiment with him as well.

Jonny stared at the back of the couch Jessie lay on like it was the only thing in his world that existed. Not even when Hadji or Benton spoke to him did his gaze waver. Or when Dr. Goodwyn entered the room and introduced herself.

She stood tall and willowy, her gray hair pulled into a bun. Race would never have described her as grandmotherly, however. She had kept herself in shape and her clothing was modern and professional.

"Good afternoon Dr. Quest, Mr. Bannon. I'm Dr. Lane Goodwyn."

Benton and Race both rose to meet her and exchange greetings.

"Thank you for meeting us on such short notice," Benton was polite as ever.

"Your children need help and they need it now," Dr. Goodwyn said. "I hope I can be that help."

"Where do we start?" Race asked.


	8. Chapter 8

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 8/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: October 11, 2012<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Everyone gets some time with Dr. Goodwyn<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "We are Soldiers", it is owned by Otherwise. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: Um, so, as usual, sorry for the long delay in the next chapter. So much life got in the way, but I promised myself during this week break that I'd finish the most recent chapter and update. So, here it is. I hope you enjoy. And I don't know if I say this enough, but: Thank you to all who not only leave me lovely reviews, but also follow or favorite me or this story. It means a lot whenever I open my email account to see another notification for a review or a follow or a favorite. I do my best not to forget the love you guys have shown me. And I promise you that, although I may sometimes take a very long time to update, I will not abandon this story. It will be finished.

And I feel the need to leave a disclaimer that I am in no ways familiar with how a therapy session works or how a therapist would go about doing his or her job to help someone who has been traumatized. I did research the best I can, but the information is vague and general. So please don't think any of what I have written in this chapter is true to life. I am simply writing what will increase conflict and help move the story along.

Chapter 8: _We are the ones who will never be broken._

As Race sat in Dr. Goodwyn's office, he studied every little detail it contained. It was a habit as natural to him as breathing or his heart beating. The office was large without being ostentatious and painted in warm, unoffending colors; three walls of a soft yellow and the last accented in a light, muted teal. He noticed the two large windows flanking her modest desk with their gauzy coverings allowing the natural light to brighten the room. His eyes roamed over the bookshelves scattered around the room holding books, files and mementos that mostly consisted of pictures with family and friends. A few pictures sat on her desk which she kept tidy. He barely glanced at the separate seating area where two arm chairs were arranged on an overly plush rug to face each other at an angle, throw pillows and blankets tossed on them carelessly but invitingly. A small table sat between them holding a pitcher of water and glassware. All in tones to compliment the colors on the wall.

It all had a very homey, welcoming feeling that came naturally, and Race liked that. Too pristine or business-like, or too forced, and neither Jonny nor Jessie would feel comfortable.

"Tell me about your daughter," Dr. Goodwyn requested.

Race waited for her to pull out a pad and a pen or pull her keyboard toward her, but she merely sat back in her chair and watched Race with a neutral expression.

"She's a strong girl. She's been through a lot in her life. And none of it ever seemed to have a lasting effect on her. Sure she's been shaken up quite a few times, but she toughed it out and dealt with it and moved on with her life."

Race paused to consider his daughter and what he wanted to tell Dr. Goodwyn. She waited patiently for him to speak again.

"I have worried what effect a lifestyle like ours would have on her, but she's handled it extremely well and in fact I think it's part of the reason she's grown into such an amazing young woman."

Dr. Goodwyn nodded. "Your family has quite the reputation and many rumors circulating about them."

Race looked Dr. Goodwyn in the eye. "You'd probably be surprised which are the true rumors."

"I'm only interested in the ones that'll help me help your daughter."

"Then all you need to know is that she's brave, tough, genius-level intelligent, sharp as a surgical knife and quick as a whip crack."

"You obviously hold your daughter in very high regard."

"She's also not very trusting. She gets that from me. And everything we've been through has cemented it. Can't say I don't prefer it that way, though."

"What about her relationship with Jonny? With both of Dr. Quests sons?"

"Close. Very close. All three of them. I know Jess has been worried about Jonny. She's mad at me for his arrest. But she's avoided him since he came home yesterday."

"Don't take her anger personally, Mr. Bannon. She's trying to cope with a lot and for now that is one of her outlets."

Race didn't say anything in response. He looked at his hands clasped together and felt Dr. Goodwyn's gaze on him.

"What can you tell me about the events that transpired that caused Jessie's trauma?"

Race had already barely moved, but at Dr. Goodwyn's question, he became very still.

"He raped her-or… was raping her. When Jonny interrupted them."

Race shook his head and covered his face with one hand. His voice came out slightly muffled.

"Jonny fought off Zach who ended up dead."

Race dropped his hand from his face and shrugged but he didn't look at Dr. Goodwyn.

"That it's difficult to speak of what happened to your daughter and Jonny, even if you weren't directly involved, is perfectly normal. I know you feel helpless Mr. Bannon. I want you to know you're already doing everything right. Jessie is very fragile and she's most likely going to remain so for a few days longer, maybe even a couple of weeks. Continue to let her know that you're there for her, be available for her, but don't push her."

"Jonny needs her. I don't think he'd be so bad if she wouldn't hide from him. I don't know what's going through his head. I can't even begin to imagine. But she's worse when she's near him. And he'd be better if she'd let him get close."

"Even so, you can't push her into something that makes her uncomfortable. It'll only exasperate her condition."

"No. Of course not."

"Where is her mother, Mr. Bannon?" Dr. Goodwyn asked as almost a second thought.

"She works in South America, but she's traveling here as we speak."

"Good. Jessie'll need all the support she can get."

Finally Race looked Dr. Goodwyn in the eye. "Thank you."

* * *

><p>"You and your son are very close."<p>

"Yes, I'm close with both of them," Benton nodded. "It is a luxury I do not take for granted."

"And your sons also share a close bond with each other."

"Extremely close. Closer than most brothers related by blood."

"Luxury is a good way to describe it. These strong relationships will help him to heal. Has Jonny experienced any other traumas in his life?"

"Plenty, but he's sailed through them just fine. No problems at all."

"Trauma doesn't always manifest in obvious ways."

"I'm not unaware of that, Dr. Goodwyn. As you already mentioned, I am very close with both of my sons. We communicate often about the events we have all experienced. They know they are free to speak with me about anything. And they commonly do."

"I did not mean to make you defensive, Dr. Quest. I am only asking the questions that will help me understand your family and your son better so that I can help him." Dr. Goodwyn paused for a moment then asked, "Can you recall any experiences at all that Jonny didn't 'sail through just fine', as you put it?"

Something in the way Dr. Goodwyn looked at him told Benton she was referring to a very specific incident. One she knew he would be reluctant to speak of.

Dr. Goodwyn must have sensed that Benton had caught on to her line of questioning. "I ask because I need to hear the answer from you."

Dr. Goodwyn didn't take her neutral gaze from Benton. He tried waiting her out to see if he could bluff her into moving on to something else, but she proved patient.

"His mother's death of course," Benton said in a whisper, looking not at Dr. Goodwyn now, but through her. "And the period directly after."

"What can you tell me about the event?"

_Everything. Nothing. Don't talk about it as if it was some high society social gala._

Benton kept his thoughts to himself. He shook his head. His mouth pulled into a tight line. He rubbed his palms together.

"Jonny was young?" Dr. Goodwyn asked in an effort to get Benton talking.

"If you've already researched the event, then why are you asking me about it?"

"Because the information about it is scarce and very light on the details. It mentions little to nothing on how you or Jonny reacted to your wife's death or how you coped."

"We coped," Benton bit back. "We're fine. Obviously we got through it just fine."

"You're not being very convincing."

"And we came here so you could help my son. With what happened two days ago. Not what happened eight years ago."

"But it would be helpful to know if he reacted similarly to that event. And I think that perhaps you have not fully dealt with what happened-"

"No!" Benton cut her off. "You will not go there." He stood and looked down on Dr. Goodwyn with ice in his gaze. "If you cannot help my son then just say so."

Dr. Goodwyn stared back with mouth pursed and a look that said she wasn't sure she was willing to let the subject go. Benton both respected and hated her for it.

"I will do my best to help your son if you'll let me," Dr. Goodwyn finally said, her face returning to its neutral expression.

Benton wished he could know for sure that she wouldn't bring up Rachel again. He didn't think he could get such a promise from her. He almost walked out the door with the intention of taking his sons somewhere else. He couldn't say why exactly he instead lowered himself back into his chair.

"I'm afraid of how this whole thing is affecting Hadji as well," he said quietly.

Dr. Goodwyn nodded. "I agree. I would actually like to speak with him next."

* * *

><p>"I am not sure why you asked to speak with me. It is Jonny and Jessie who need your help the most," Hadji admitted as he took the chair in front of Dr. Goodwyn's desk.<p>

"Because your father is worried about you and I share his concern," Dr. Goodwyn answered openly.

"Other than being worried about Jonny and Jessie, I am fine. I only wish to do what I can for my brother and our dearest friend."

"And they will need you. Your close bond with both your brother and Miss Bannon may allow you freedoms with them that I cannot take. Nor will I ask you to break any confidences you have with them. I hope you know that you will be an important part of their healing process and that I will give you all the support that I can."

"I appreciate you saying so, Dr. Goodwyn."

"I just want to make sure that you understand how important it is for you not harm yourself by taking on too much."

Hadji shook his head. "I am not sure what you mean by that."

Dr. Goodwyn leaned forward. "Only that sometimes those trying to help the people they love can end up overexerting themselves, neglecting themselves and putting all priority on those they are trying to help."

"Given our current situation, I do not think it an error to make Jonny or Jessie a priority."

"And they should be, but not at the expense of your own health. So just let me give you this advice, Hadji. Do not neglect to do those things that will allow you to remain strong for your brother and your friend. And don't feel bad or selfish for taking some time to take care of yourself."

A small smile crossed Hadji's lips. "I hope you said the same thing to my father and Race."

* * *

><p>Jessie could not sit still. She fidgeted as she sat in one of the two arm chairs Dr. Goodwyn had invited Jessie to join her at. Jessie's gaze flicked around the room, but mostly she looked between the door and the windows.<p>

"You are very much like your father," Dr. Goodwyn noted; kindly, non-chalantly.

"Funny. Most people think Jonny's more like my dad."

Jessie didn't sound amused at all. She looked over her shoulder at the door again.

"Would you feel more comfortable if I left it open?"

Jessie's head whipped around to look at Dr. Goodwyn. Really the first time since she'd come into the waiting room. Dr. Goodwyn regarded her with a patient expectancy that put no pressure on Jessie at all. After a long silent moment, Jessie shook her head, pulled one of the pillows into her lap and stared at her hands picking at the stray threads.

"Can you tell me how you're feeling right now?"

Jessie snorted at the question as if the answer should be obvious. A reaction that said she did not deign to bother to answer. Dr. Goodwyn allowed the silence to continue longer than Jessie expected her to.

"What would you like to tell me?"

The question surprised Jessie. She had been waiting to hear basically the same question asked using different words. The stupid "trick" psychologists use to try to get a response from their patients.

Jessie looked up at Dr. Goodwyn again. This time she really looked at Dr. Goodwyn. The woman had a great poker face. Jessie found nothing there but a patiently neutral expression.

"Help Jonny. He's the one that really needs it."

"I am certainly going to try to do that," Dr. Goodwyn assured softly. "You know you could help out both him and I."

Jessie chewed on her lip as she considered Dr. Goodwyn's statement. "How?"

"By not running away from him."

Jessie looked away, hiding her face from Dr. Goodwyn.

"What makes being around him uncomfortable?"

Jessie shook her head and still refused to look at Dr. Goodwyn. A sob shook her shoulders and she covered her mouth with one of her hands.

"Shhh, Jessie. It's okay. You don't have to tell me now. But I want you to think about it. And I want you to be ready to tell me the next time you come see me, if you can."

Jessie didn't respond. Not even when Dr. Goodwyn tried to offer tissues for her tears. She simply continued to cry and refused to look at Dr. Goodwyn.

* * *

><p>Dr. Goodwyn studied the young man sitting in the arm chair Jessie had recently vacated, though only after she had pulled herself together enough to face her waiting family. Jonny sat exactly the same way he had in her waiting room: forearms resting on his legs, hands clasped loosely together, gaze on the floor. He didn't even really seem to notice that he had moved into a new room, though he hadn't resisted when his father had led him in.<p>

"Jonny," Dr. Goodwyn called. "Jonny. Can you hear me?"

He didn't react. Dr. Goodwyn allowed him to sit in silence for a few moments as she considered him a little longer.

"Jonny, you don't have to say anything, but I would like to know that you are listening. Can you show me that you hear me?"

Dr. Goodwyn thought maybe she saw some movement in Jonny's eyes, but she couldn't be sure. Otherwise he didn't move.

"Jonny, if I ask you to do something so that I know you can hear me, do you think you could do it for me?"

He didn't answer, but Dr. Goodwyn continued anyways.

"Could you touch your nose, Jonny?"

Just barely Jonny's clasped fingers tightened. He made no other movements.

Dr. Goodwyn pursed her lips. She was going to have to push him a little harder. But she would need to move carefully.

"I think it would be good for you to hear that Jessie is very worried about you."

Jonny gasped and he looked up to stare straight ahead instead of at the floor. His whole being seemed to vibrate. Dr. Goodwyn kept her voice calm and soft.

"She asked that I do everything I can to help you."

Jonny stayed frozen.

"I think you want me to do the same for her."

A definite twitch in his eyes.

"I asked her to do a favor for me, and I'm going to ask a favor of you as well."

Dr. Goodwyn paused for a moment to see if Jonny would give some kind of acknowledgement.

Nothing.

"Do not take Jessie's actions personally. She is doing her best to cope."

Still no more movement.

"And think of something that you would like to share with me the next time you come see me."

Jonny relaxed again, eyes back on the floor. Dr. Goodwyn could get no more reactions from him.


	9. Chapter 9

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 9/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: March 29, 2013<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Estella arrives at the compound. Jessie tries to do what Dr. Goodwyn asked of her.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Inside Out", Eve 6 does. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Note: Hello everyone. I'm back with a long overdue update. With some of the recent fics that have been uploaded to the JQ section of , I got inspired/felt guilty for not updating and came up with this. Hope you like it.

Before I go any further, I do have to say THANK YOU to all who have reviewed, followed and favorited. I know I get more than I deserve for how long it takes me to update. You are too kind and I promise each and every one is noted and appreciated. I wish I had time to respond to each review personally, but life is busy. I hope this will make up for the lack of personal responses.

Again, please enjoy.

Chapter 9: _The tick tock of the clock is painful, all sane and logical. I want to tear it off the wall. I hear words in clips and phrases, I think sick like ginger ale. My stomach turns and I exhale._

Race sighed in relief when he finally spotted Estella appear in the entrance to the small private Quest jet that had just pulled into the private Quest hangar. It was a small relief. Not even enough to relax the muscles between his shoulder blades that had been tight since he'd found Jonny and Jessie sitting on that front porch together. But a relief nonetheless.

He stepped forward and waved to get her attention. She spotted him immediately. The exhausted look on her face lessened when she did and she hurried her step to meet him.

Then Race did something that surprised even himself.

When they met, he drew her into his arms and held her close for a long time. She didn't fight him. In fact, she embraced him in return like they were still married and this was naturally what they should be doing.

Estella buried her face into his shoulder and he rested his cheek against her hair.  
>The charged silence between them lasted for many moments before either broke it.<p>

"I'm so glad you're here," his whisper came out slightly hoarse.

She squeezed him and then pulled back to look at his face. She spoke her thoughts on what she saw there. "I've never once, not in all the time that we were married or after all the missions you returned from, seen you look so tired."

Race closed his eyes and let his hands skim down her arms to rest in her hands. Mentally he agreed that he'd never felt so tired.

"Come on," he released her hand—just one of them—and led her toward his waiting car, "You can wait in the car while they unload your luggage. How was your flight?"

"Long." The tone of her voice said plenty in that one word.

Race didn't miss the way she stayed close to him in the short distance between the plane and the car. He was honestly glad for it. He opened the passenger door and helped her in before turning to help the pilot stow her luggage in the trunk. They were on the road in no time.

"And how are Jessie and Jonny…and everyone?" Estella asked once they were on the highway.

"Not much change. Their first meeting with Dr. Goodwyn went…well."

Estella didn't miss his hesitation. "What do you mean? Were you expecting something to go wrong?"

Race shrugged his shoulders, trying to loosen the muscles as he thought about what to say to Estella. In vain. They were no less tight than before. He wished he had the courage to hold her hand again, but his stayed firmly on the shifter between them.

He blew out a loud breath. "I honestly wasn't sure what to expect. Jessie is so damned paranoid—and I know I only have myself to blame for that—and I wasn't sure if she'd even give Dr. Goodwyn a chance. I wouldn't have been surprised by some theatrics from her, but she came out fairly calm. Not better, but calm. Jonny wouldn't say a word to her, though she seemed pleased with getting any kind of a reaction out of him."

"How'd she do that?"

"The same way any of us do. By bringing up Jessie…or what happened to her attacker. Bit of advice. Don't do it. It's not a good reaction."

"I'll remember that." She paused before asking, "You really don't think he-"

"I don't know."

Race's statement was grim and final. He didn't want to speak about it. They said nothing more for the duration of the car ride.

* * *

><p>The house was quiet. Usually this was one of the things Jessie loved about the compound. Five people and one dog living together in three stories and thousands of square footage meant it was never impossible to find a quiet place should you want one. Even if Jonny often got quite rowdy.<p>

_You could be blamed of the same thing…_

But now the quietness of the house unnerved Jessie. She spent most of her time wandering, unable to stay in one place for long. Trying to convince herself she was safe and didn't need to constantly look over her shoulder. She mostly avoided her dad, but every so often she needed the comforting security of his presence. The moment she laid eyes on him, she'd turn and wander off again reassured and not able to stand being near him.

And then Jonny came home. And she wanted nothing more than to tell him, somehow, that everything would be okay and they'd get through this like they always did.

Then she actually saw him and though she knew it was wrong, she ran away and hid.

If she wasn't wandering, she was hiding. Along with being quiet, the main house—mansion, really— of the Quest Compound held infinite possibilities for hiding. It came in handy for those times when she couldn't stop the rush of memories, feelings, sensations and she didn't want anybody to hear her sobbing.

Especially since Jonny came home. She knew hearing her pain would only worsen his condition. She didn't want to add to whatever he was going through. He didn't deserve it in the first place. Not after what he'd done to save her.

Jessie didn't miss the irony of fighting with him mere days ago about not needing to be protected only to have him rescue her like a knight in shining armor. She would never again complain about his uncontrollable need to protect her.

Right now she wished Jonny could do exactly that for her. She couldn't escape…_him. _Not for a moment. Always lurking in the back of her mind. Making appearances without any provocation. The most random things set him off. She stayed far away from any bedrooms. She'd break every mirror in this house if she could.

Her second attempt at a shower since her dad had brought her home had been brief. She'd kept her eyes closed so she didn't have to look at the marks he'd left on her. The skin on her wrists was still raw from being tied up and pulling against the restraints with such force. Those were the easiest to face.

She hadn't noticed in the moment how rough _he_ had actually been with her. The welts from the knife. Bruising.

_You were lucky not to have worse._

She didn't feel lucky.

If she kept dwelling on him he would make an appearance. Think about something else. Anything else to keep that from happening.

School was supposed to start in less than a week. She didn't see herself or Jonny being there on the first day.

Her mom was arriving today. Her dad had left a while ago to pick her up. Jessie didn't know how to feel about that. She supposed she should feel comforted. Or something. She figured she'd have to wait until her mother was here in this house before she decided how she felt about it.

And speaking of people that she didn't know how she felt about, she still hadn't come to any conclusions about Dr. Goodwyn. The woman—the whole experience—had been so confusing. Jessie wanted to trust Dr. Goodwyn. In their brief conversation Jessie had been so close to just telling her everything she was feeling and thinking since the attack, though Dr. Goodwyn would never know that.

But Jessie had always struggled with trusting strangers. And right now it was difficult to trust anyone no matter who they were, or what they said, or how many degrees they had hanging on the walls of their office.

But Jessie had wanted to believe her so badly when she'd said she would do everything she could to help Jonny.

_Jonny._

Dr. Goodwyn's request echoed through her mind.

_You know you could help out both him and I._

Jessie wanted to. So bad. So bad she physically hurt.

But there had to be another way.

_You know she's right. Stop running away._

Jessie looked around herself. She'd not been paying attention as she wandered. She was on the first floor standing in a remote hallway. The entrance to Dr. Quest's personal study stood a few feet away. She could hear a low voice—Hadji—emanating from the slightly ajar double doors.

And if Hadji was in there, Jonny would be too. Hadji hadn't left Jonny's side since they'd come home.

_You should be in there too. He needs you._

Jessie stared at the door. She balled her hands into fists. She ordered her feet to carry her to the door. The volume of Hadji's voice increased as she drew nearer. He was not saying anything important. Just talking.

_Hoping he'll hit upon something Jonny will respond to._

Jessie forced herself to step into the opening. Jonny and Hadji sat on the leather loveseat against the right hand wall. Jonny sat staring at the floor on the farther side. Hadji sat nearer, angled toward his brother so Jessie was looking mostly at his back.

She felt like she didn't recognize them. Hadji was his usually calm self, turban in place, impeccably dressed, but the slight tremor in his voice somehow changed him entirely.

And Jonny.

He was just not himself. No sunny smile. No bright eyes. Any other time, he would have sensed her immediately and turned to greet her. Any other time, she would have announced her entrance by now.

The worst was just how quiet he was. Jonny wasn't quiet. Not ever. "Noisy" seemed to be part of his personality. If he'd just say one word, Jessie would take back every crack she'd made about wishing he had a mute button.

He turned his head toward her. For a moment she met his gaze, but a moment was all she could take. Just as Hadji noticed something had Jonny's attention and was looking over his shoulder to see what, Jessie twisted out of the entrance.

She pressed a hand over her mouth to stifle the sob that threatened to expose her. She turned and fled in case one of them came out looking for her.

She ran right into her parents just coming in the door. They looked startled at her sudden appearance, and then more so at the fresh tear tracks on her face.

"Jessie, are you okay?" her father asked.

Jessie looked at him, not sure what to say. She hadn't been okay since…

_Don't think about it!_

Race took a step toward her. "Your mother's here."

"Jessie," Estella spoke gently.

Although she hadn't shown it, Jessie had hoped having her mother here would somehow make a difference.

Jessie now realized she couldn't have been more wrong.

Shaking her head, she backed away from her parents.

As much as she loved her mother, having her here was just one more person to have to deal with. One more person she couldn't face.

Jessie turned to run again only to find Hadji standing at the entrance to the hall she'd just come from. And Jonny standing farther back mostly in shadow, though Jessie was painfully aware of his presence and his eyes on her.

Dr. Quest appeared at the top of the stairs. "Race? Estella? Is that you?"

Too many people. She couldn't stand all of them looking at her.

She couldn't stand Jonny looking at her.

_I'm sorry._

Jessie ran away from her family, not caring where she went so long as she could be alone.

* * *

><p>"And that's pretty much how things have been around here."<p>

Benton, Race and Estella sat in Benton's study. Benton at his desk and Race and Estella on the loveseat.

After Jessie had fled, Race had let Estella go after her. He knew nothing he said would've kept Estella from her daughter in that moment. But Jessie had hidden herself well and Estella reappeared twenty minutes later with no clue where her daughter was.

Jessie didn't show up at all.

When night had fallen and Jessie still hadn't shown herself, Race took a moment to have IRIS confirm that Jessie was still on the compound grounds and safe. That was all he could ask for right now, even though Estella tried to demand IRIS tell her where Jessie was hiding.

Race cancelled the demand. As worried as he was for his daughter, he knew violating her need to be alone would only send Jessie running even further away. He calmly explained such to Estella, who hadn't looked happy about it, but had agreed to let their daughter be.

"I really hoped you being here would give her someone she'd be comfortable around," Race said now to his ex-wife.

Estella squeezed his hand. "Perhaps it was just too much at one time. We all seemed to converge on her at once."

Hadji had taken Jonny to rest for the night in the far recesses of the mansion and Race had set up both his and Jessie's temporary beds in the rec room for when she did turn up. Estella had volunteered to stay with her for the night, but Race objected on the grounds that she at least get one good night of sleep after her long trip. Estella tried only once more to convince him, but when he stayed adamant, she acquiesced.

"Tomorrow night, however, you are getting some sleep," she had told him and Race took his turn not arguing.

He had come to Benton's study with the intention of checking the news only to find Benton in here just finishing a call to Mr. Fitzmichael. When Race raised his eyebrows in question, Benton had just shook his head.

Just as Race had been settling into the love seat, Estella appeared and joined the men.

"You don't have to watch this. I just need to keep updated on what's being said about us out there."

"Stop trying to protect me, Race. You've got your hands full enough protecting Jessie and Jonny right now."

Race was too tired to argue. He ordered IRIS to bring up any news stories relating to the Quests. A painting large enough to cover almost the entire wall opposite the loveseat suddenly changed and revealed that it was in actuality a TV screen. A news story two days old began to play.

The local news stations were still running short blips, though they didn't have anything new to add. The national news stations had finally picked up the story and they told it in context with a more detailed background story of the Quests. The family had made the national news many times before, and many of those stories were now referenced by the anchors.

But it was the last news story that worried Race, and Benton too by the look on his face.

Race didn't recognize Mrs. Ellis at first. The last time he'd seen her she'd been wearing a robe and the stench of stale alcohol and cheap cigarettes. The woman pictured on the screen looked professional and merciless. The messy ponytail had been replaced with a neat coif, the tired, wrinkled face painstakingly made up to make the woman appear younger.

Her eyes weren't bloodshot, but Race thought, even just looking at the image on a TV screen, that he recognized the slightly glassy appearance in them that said she wasn't totally sober.

Even more startling than her appearance was the words she spoke to the crowd of reporters surrounding her.

"I will make sure the person responsible for the murder of my son is punished to the full extent of the law."

She sounded the same as she had the day Race met her, even if she looked like a completely different person. Cold. Businesslike.

"Shut it off, IRIS," Benton ordered.

The news story disappeared and the painting returned.

Race continued to stare at the screen.

Could the woman really not be aware of what her son had been doing before Jonny had…interrupted him? Or was she in denial?

Or perhaps she didn't care.

"I will not let her get away with this," Benton stated.

Race nodded. "Sounds like another call to Mr. Fitzmichael is in store."

Benton reached for the phone.


	10. Chapter 10

Title: Blue-eyed Angel, 10/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: April 15, 2013<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Race and Benton muse about current affairs in the Quest Compound. Jessie has another session with Dr. Goodwyn.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "I Want to Save You", Something Corporate does. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing.

Author's Note: Not even a month since the last update? Goddess Evie is on a _roll_! I don't have much to say except I hope you enjoy it. Who knows when the next one will come? This one just seemed to flow along with the last one. The next one I fear might take more time because I think I'm finally ready to get into Jonny's head/POV. I think. I sure hope so. I've certainly put it off long enough.

I tried my best to respond to all signed reviews, but for all the reviews I've received for my last chapter, as well as the follows and favorites, thank you so much. You guys are the best. I hope you like this chapter too!

Chapter 10: _I want to save you. I want to save you. I need you. Save me too. I want to save you._

Race took a sip of his coffee as he sat at the desk in the anteroom of his suite with a laptop in front of him. He'd spent another restless night on the rec room floor talking Jessie down from her nightmares every few hours. Those were definitely not lessening, not in intensity or frequency.

Jessie hadn't made an appearance the night before until Estella had retired to her room. Race knew then that Jessie had kept herself close but hidden. He wondered that Jessie was avoiding Estella. He'd been sure Jessie would've found some relief in having Estella here.

The first couple of times Jessie woke screaming, Estella had come running. Race had motioned her to stay back while he calmed Jessie. Both times, once Jessie had settled, Estella had tried to approach her daughter with no success. Jessie shied away, pulling her comforter around herself like a shield.

"I don't understand it," Estella had told Race out in the hallway, her voice barely a whisper. "She's never pushed me away before. Never. Why won't she let me near."

Race shook his head and repeated the words Dr. Goodwyn had said to him only a couple days earlier. "Don't take it personally, Stel. She's got a lot going on in that head of hers. Until she's ready to speak about it, we've just got to give her the space she needs."

"But she knows we want to help her, right?"

"I think she does. And we can keep letting her know that without intruding on her too much. So when she's ready, she'll come to us."

Estella nodded and headed back to her room.

The third time Jessie awoke screaming, after Race calmed her and sent Estella back to bed, he came back into the rec room to Jessie staring at the doorway and the hallway behind.

"I wish she hadn't come," she said.

"Jessica," Race scolded.

He was glad Estella hadn't been there to hear that.

"Your mother is here because she's worried about you. She just wants to help you be okay."

Jessie looked away. Her go to response anymore. She didn't look the least bit apologetic for her comment.

Race sighed and moved to sit on the edge of the coffee table.

"Why don't you want her here?" he asked neutrally.

Jessie shrugged without looking up. She leaned over and rested her head on the arm of the sofa. Race knew he wouldn't get an answer.

And the next time Jessie awoke from her nightmares, Race told Estella not to come down anymore. He made up reasons why she shouldn't bother, but she seemed to know there was something he wasn't telling her, though she didn't ask. As requested, she made no appearance the rest of the night.

Once it was apparent Jessie would not be trying to sleep anymore—first light as usual—Race had made his leave of her. He needed time to himself. He needed to do something everyday and normal. First a shower and fresh change of clothes. A cup of coffee. And then the daily morning security checks.

He still had the system set at its highest level despite some of the inconveniences that caused. If it brought some sense of security to his family, he'd keep it at that setting indefinitely.

The news crews at the gates caused a lot of pings to the system. The local teams were gone, but the national crews were sticking around. So long as the Quests stayed silent, those crews would disappear as well. Probably in the next day or two. Without any kind of story, the reporters would be reassigned to other stories.

They'd be back for the hearing, of course.

Seeing the news crews, he thought of Mrs. Ellis on the TV the night before. He, Benton and Estella had all agreed to keep that information from Jonny and Jessie. Even Hadji, if he absolutely didn't need to know, which he didn't. Hadji had enough to deal with just trying to help Jonny. And if anyone was going to do that other than Jessie, Race had his money on Hadji.

And Jonny and Jessie certainly didn't need to know about what Mrs. Ellis was saying.

Race did a quick review of the rest of the perimeter. Nothing more than small pings, but with the security system set up at high levels even some larger birds would cause those.

Race shut down the lap top and leaned back in his desk chair. He'd take a few more moments to finish his coffee and then go check on Jessie. Maybe find Jonny and Hadji and see how they were doing. Make sure Benton wasn't spiraling. He'd seen a few signs that said the good doctor could do just that at any moment, but for the most part he was keeping himself level.

His coffee gone too quickly, Race rose and left his room. He met Jonny along the way, mysteriously alone. He leaned against one wall and stared at the other. The tracker around his ankle blinked with a tiny green light, showing it was working.

Race knew that the best approach in a situation like this was to just treat the person normally.

"Morning, Jonny. You see Hadji or your dad around yet?"

No response.

Race wasn't sure whether it would be good to leave him alone, but he certainly didn't want to drag him along when his next destination was to find Jessie.

Well, if he tried to leave even just the mansion, Benton had ordered IRIS to let both he and Race know. His tracker gave him some freedom to move about the grounds, but nobody felt secure in letting him leave the main house.

"I'll see you around, Jonny. I'm off to see what's for breakfast."

Still no response, but Race hadn't expected one.

Race moved on along the halls to the kitchen.

Jessie and Estella sat at the breakfast counter. Both had bowls in front of them. Race stopped in the doorway to watch them. He remembered Jessie's comment from last night. _I wish she hadn't come._

For now, at least, Jessie was trying to tolerate her mother. She wouldn't look at Estella, but she wouldn't let herself turn away either. Mostly she stared at her bowl and gave her mother short answers. But she answered.

Estella was struggling too. Her hands kept fidgeting and Race knew exactly how she felt. They'd never either of them had to hesitate to pull their daughter close to offer her comfort, and that instinct was strong. He knew what an effort it was taking her to give Jessie the space she needed.

Whatever they were talking about, it was in tones too low for Race to pick up. He crossed to the coffee pot and saw Estella notice him. The look she threw him was not hopeful.

He raised his coffee mug to her in greeting.

Jessie's eyes flicked at him over her shoulder but otherwise she gave him no more notice. He'd like to tell her he was proud of her for not shutting her mother out, but there was no way to do that now.

"If you need me," Race said to them both before he left, "just ask IRIS and she'll let you know where I am."

* * *

><p>Benton leaned back in his desk chair in his study and rubbed his eyes. He'd just got off the phone with Mr. Fitzmichael. It had not been a good conversation. After seeing Zach's mother on the news last night, Benton had done exactly what Race had suggested and called Mr. Fitzmichael despite having just recently finished a conversation with him.<p>

That second conversation had been brief. Benton wanted him to know about Mrs. Ellis' words and share his concern over what that could mean. Mr. Fitzmichael had assured Benton he'd look into it first thing in the morning and get back to him immediately. That was as long as the conversation had needed to be.

And Mr. Fitzmichael had kept his word.

Mrs. Ellis—no, Ms. Babcock, she hadn't gone by Ellis since the divorce—was putting pressure on the district attorney. Mr. Fitzmichael didn't think that would necessarily change the outcome of the hearing. But even if Jonny wasn't found guilty, Ms. Babcock could slap them with a civil suit. And Benton and Mr. Fitzmichael agreed it was something they should expect.

One more thing that Jonny didn't need.

_One battle at a time, as Mr. Fitzmichael put it._

They would worry about the civil suit if and when it came, and not before.

In the meantime, the district attorney was pushing for a deposition. Mr. Fitzmichael had been trying to put it off but the judge had decided to let it go ahead. The date and time were already set. They would all meet in three days at the district attorney's office whether or not Jonny and Jessie were able to talk.

_The DA's going to be disappointed if he thinks he'll get anything out of those two._

Jonny and Jessie were scheduled to see Dr. Goodwyn again before the depositions, but Benton didn't put much stock in one visit getting either to talk.

On top of that, he had local and national media pushing for a statement. Not only were news vans physically parked outside the compound's front gate so that they had to call the Rockport police to clear them out any time they wanted to leave—which wasn't very often, thankfully—but phone calls and emails abounded. After the first five phone calls, Benton had set IRIS to block them and auto-respond with a pre-recorded message that no statements would be given at this time. The emails he had IRIS shunt into one folder of his personal account. A folder he planned on having deleted without ever looking at once everything calmed down.

Whenever that would be.

Benton was drawn from his morose thoughts when Hadji entered the room looking more frantic than he'd ever seen his elder son.

"Hadji, what's wrong?"

"I cannot find Jonny."

"He was still in the room this morning when I left you two. He was…resting. And you were meditating."

Hadji paced around the room.

Hadji never paced. Period.

"He must have left while I was meditating. I thought I would know. I didn't mean to let him go off on his own. I-"

Benton stood to approach his son. He stopped Hadji's pacing with his hands on his son's arms. "He hasn't left the house. IRIS would have notified me. He's around here somewhere. Maybe he just needed some alone time. You haven't let him out of your sight since we paid his bail."

"But what if he runs into Jessie? She does not handle being in his presence very well. And it upsets Jonny further. Or what if he-"

"Hadji stop!"

For the first time in their short conversation, Hadji really looked at Benton.

"We'll find him. IRIS can locate him."

The look Hadji gave his father was utterly helpless and broke Benton's heart. Benton raised his head and called out, "IRIS, locate Jonny please."

"Jonny is currently in the library."

"Is he moving?"

"Negative."

Hadji sagged a little at IRIS' response. In relief, Benton thought.

Hadji then addressed IRIS, "Where is Jessie?"

"Jessie is currently in the kitchen."

Hadji looked much calmer then. He nodded his head. "I will go to Jonny."

Hadji disengaged himself from Benton and left the study immediately. Benton stood where Hadji had left him, staring at the doorway.

_Perhaps Jonny and Jessie aren't the only ones who'll need to speak with Dr. Goodwyn._

* * *

><p>Another visit to see Dr. Goodwyn. Jessie sat in the same seat in her office, worrying the stitches on the same pillow. If she admitted she hated being here, she'd be lying. But she still didn't feel quite comfortable with Dr. Goodwyn.<p>

"I understand you are going to be deposed tomorrow."

Jessie nodded without looking up.

"How do you feel about that?"

She shrugged. "It's pointless."

"Agreed."

Jessie looked at Dr. Goodwyn. She hadn't expected that answer. "Why?"

"Do you feel ready to tell what happened?"

Jessie didn't have to think before she shook her head.

"And Jonny is not speaking to anybody. It's a pointless exercise that I am afraid will only make you and Jonny worse when I am trying to help you get better."

Jessie's gaze wandered back to her fingers picking at threads.

"So why are they doing it?"

"From what I understand, the judge is willing to give the attorneys a chance before it is decided that neither of you are ready for this investigation to move forward."

Silence. Not even a physical reaction from Jessie.

"I'm going to be there. Your parents, Dr. Quest and Mr. Fitzmichael all expressed they would feel better if I was."

"Do you think it'll change anything?"

"If you mean do I think it'll make you or Jonny more likely to talk, I don't think so. But I do hope to keep any further damage from happening to the two of you. As I said, my goal is to help you both heal, and I'd rather neither of you were forced to face anything that would push you further away from that goal."

Jessie took a shaky breath and released it.

"If there was one thing you could say about the incident, what would that be?"

Jessie tested Dr. Goodwyn's patience. She let the silence stretch on for many minutes. Longer than she would have thought Dr. Goodwyn would have allowed it to continue. At any moment she expected the older woman to give up and ask a different question.

Dr. Goodwyn apparently had patience in spades. She probably had a lot of practice.

"I've experienced a lot of scary things in my life. And I'm not talking about thrill seeking. Things I was pulled into against my will that were very frightening in deed." Jessie took another shaky breath and shut her eyes. "Of all the things I've experienced, this was one of the worst." A pause. "Not the scariest. But top five definitely."

Dr. Goodwyn said nothing in response. This time she let the silence reign to give Jessie a chance to compose herself.

When Jessie lifted her head and opened her eyes and seemed to breathe a little easier, Dr. Goodwyn asked her next question.

"Do you remember what I asked you to do at our first meeting?"

By her frown, she did remember.

"And did you do it?"

"I tried. I couldn't do it." Jessie bit her bottom lip.

"But you tried. How far did you get?"

"I let him see me. Just for a second."

"And then?"

"I ran away."

"Why?"

This question Jessie refused to answer no matter how long Dr. Goodwyn waited.

"Are you willing to keep trying?"

Jessie turned her head to look in Dr. Goodwyn's eyes. A tear slipped down her cheek and Jessie nodded her head.


	11. Chapter 11

Title: _Blue-eyed Angel_, 11/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: July 1, 2013<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: A look into Jonny's head; an incident at the deposition.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "Outside", it is owned by Staind. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing and pay a little homage to such talented musicians.

Author's Notes: Phew! What a difficult chapter to write. I admit that I put it off because I knew it was going to take something out of me. And once I did finally start it, I wanted to take my time because I knew it needed to be just right. And I think it is. We are finally getting into Jonny's head, folks. I really hope the way I portrayed it works. Please let me know in your comments.

As always, thank you so much for all the support I receive for this story with your wonderful reviews, follows and favorites. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I am not giving up on this story. I love it too much. I promise it will be finished, even if it's the last thing I do (but let's hope not).

Chapter 11: _All the times that I've cried, all that's wasted, it's all inside. But I feel all this pain; stuffed it down, it's back again._

Fog.

Thick.

Grey.

He stared at his hands. He could barely see them. But when he could they were bloodstained.

The knife. He could still feel it sticking into his stomach. Pushing in but not hurting him.

It had been facing the wrong way.

And now a young man was dead…

Dead.

He's dead.

He's dead.

Because you-

Fog.

Sometimes Hadji would appear in the grey swirling around him. He would speak soft words that Jonny couldn't quite hear.

The fog swallowed them. All but one word.

Jessie.

But Hadji had stopped saying her name.

His father appeared too, though he was always far away and misty. And as much as Jonny wanted to reach out to them, the fog stopped him.

It stopped him from speaking. He couldn't even say her name.

Especially her name.

Sometimes he thought if he could just see her, be near her, he could start to, maybe, break through the fog.

But she would have nothing to do with him.

He didn't blame her.

He didn't want to have anything to do with himself.

Not when his bloody hands rose through the fog.

And a dead boy's face materialized before him.

And Jessie's cries for help echoed through the dense matter.

And then the fog thickened.

Or Hadji would break through and for a moment the fog would dissipate entirely and Jonny would look around and see he was home in one of the myriad rooms of the compound.

Never the same room.

And Jessie was never there, though he always looked for her.

And then the fog would swirl in and surround him and it would all start over again.

And Hadji's breakthroughs became fewer and farther between. Until he broke through no more.

He had no sense of time. No sense of place. No sense of movement even.

The fog obscured all.

Sometimes he half-remembered an older woman. Or perhaps he'd dreamed her. He thought maybe she'd been trying to say something to him, but the fog hid her again before he could be sure.

Except for one vivid moment when she'd mentioned Jessie.

But like everybody else, the older woman stopped talking about her.

Would he live the rest of his life in the fog?

Would it be so bad if he did?

* * *

><p>Hadji was out there in the fog somewhere. Jonny couldn't see him. The fog was too thick. But he knew his brother was there.<p>

Because Hadji was always there. Jonny might not know where he was, or the time of day, but he knew Hadji was there. Always there.

It was better than navigating the dense grey matter alone. Marginally.

He knew Hadji was speaking because he could hear a buzzing from somewhere deep in the fog. Or perhaps he was deep in the fog and the buzzing was coming somewhere from the edges where his family hovered. Or maybe he was at one edge and his family at the other and fog swirled between them, separating them.

He sensed her. He looked up and saw her.

Her presence made the fog explode from around him like a strong ray of sunlight burning through.

Now he could see Hadji. He sat with his brother on a love seat in his father's private study. He could hear Hadji's soft words clearly, though they didn't make sense. He didn't take the time to make them make sense.

Jessie stood in the doorway. She looked okay. Physically. She didn't seem to be hurt in any way.

Her face told another story. He had just time to meet her eyes and register the pain there before she disappeared again.

_She doesn't want anything to do with you._

Hadji stopped talking. Stopped buzzing.

Jonny stood and moved to the doorway. He didn't want her to go. He tried to call after her, but his mouth would make no sound.

She had made the fog go away.

He stumbled out into the hall in time to see her rush around the corner towards the front hall.

Already the fog was encroaching at the edge of his vision.

He followed her down the hall, keeping to the wall in case the fog blocked his vision again. He was almost to the end when Hadji stopped him.

Jonny looked at his brother. Hadji's face and eyes were full of worry. The fog was beginning to obscure him.

Jonny heard voices coming from the front hall. Somebody said Jessie's name and he lurched after the sound.

Hadji put a hand on his arm, stopping him. He moved past Jonny into the front hall. From where he stood, Jonny could just see Jessie. The fog retreated again and he saw Race and Estella standing in the doorway.

Jessie faced them, but abruptly she turned in his direction. He couldn't help looking at her. Even though he knew how he made her feel.

_She can't stand to be around you._

At least she could run away from him.

She did just that.

This time, Jonny chose not to follow. He leaned against the wall and the fog came sweeping back.

Hadji was buzzing again, but it was useless.

The fog swarmed in thicker and darker than ever.

* * *

><p>The fog didn't let up for what seemed like days. Maybe it really was. Jonny couldn't know with grey swirling all around him.<p>

It also didn't let anybody in. Not even Hadji. Jonny couldn't see him at all, couldn't sense his presence. Only occasionally could he hear the buzzing of his brother's words. He knew his brother was still present only because Hadji would not abandon him. That was a fact.

Jonny sat with his arms resting on his thighs, his hands hanging down between his legs. He had no clue where he was. Somewhere in the compound? Or had he been brought somewhere else? He couldn't say.

He tried not to look at his hands so he wouldn't have to see the bloodstains. But the only other place to look was into the fog.

Was Hadji still out there? He hadn't heard even the faintest of buzzing in so long. What about his father? Race?

Jessie?

And did it even matter?

Jonny looked up, squinting to see through the fog, when he thought he heard something through the dense matter.

Not Hadji. This sounded angry.

"My son!"

Was it his father? But what could have upset him so?

Where was he, anyway? What was going on? Who was out there?

Jonny concentrated, trying to push the fog away. It dissipated only a little.

"You killed him!"

Jonny's head jerked up. The fog drifted away. He did not know where he was other than to know that he wasn't at the compound. His father and his brother stood in front of where he sat, but they couldn't block the woman yelling right at him.

He knew her. He remembered talking to her. Lying to her. Senior pictures.

A mother without a son.

Zach Ellis.

Is dead.

"Because of you!"

Jonny fisted his hands to hide the bloodstains. He tried to say something to her.

"I know."

"I'm sorry."

"I didn't want to."

"I just wanted to stop him from—I never meant to…"

His brain and his mouth couldn't seem to work together to form the words.

His father and brother both were yelling back at the woman, but their words sounded only like buzzing.

"I'll never see my son again! You took him away from me."

_He took Jessie away from _me_. I had to get her back._

As if the thought summoned her, Jessie stood in front of him. She faced the woman. He could hear her words clearly.

"How dare you!"

"It's _my_ son that's-"

"Do you _know_ what he was doing to me?"

"You little liar. Zach would never-"

Jonny stood up. Jessie wasn't lying. He'd been there. He'd seen.

Why couldn't he find the words to say so?

"But he did."

The woman paused for a moment, then lunged at Jessie. Jonny rocked forward as if to intercept her.

Nobody else was going to hurt Jessie.

Other people intervened.

Race.

Estella.

The older woman Jonny recognized from his dreams. Or not-dreams, he supposed.

Other people he didn't know.

The screaming mother was ushered from the room, fighting the entire way.

Hadji and his father approached him. Jonny fell back down into the chair he'd been sitting in.

Where was he? What was going on?

His family was trying to talk to him, but he couldn't make out their words. Instead they buzzed like bad radio reception.

The fog was swirling in again.

And then Jessie was before him once more. Crouched down in front of him, looking up into his face.

Chasing the fog away with the intensity of her emerald stare.

Her hands rested lightly on his knees for balance.

Her red hair streamed out behind her.

The anger on her face reminded him of their recent fight. Had it been last week? Or had more time passed?

He just didn't know.

"Don't you dare listen to her."

Her voice sounded like she could break into tears.

The other people in the room stared on in silence.

He started to reach out to her, but he didn't want to get blood on her.

"You hear me? It wasn't your fault."

She chewed her bottom lip as she stared up at him. He could see how increasingly difficult it was for her to be near him. So, why did she stay?

"It wasn't your fault."

Perhaps she wanted a response from him?

Oh how he wanted to say something to her. He had so much to say to her.

His thoughts wouldn't organize themselves. His mouth moved but it had no words to speak.

He closed it tightly.

"Don't you believe a word she said."

Jonny did the only thing his body would cooperate with.

He nodded at her. Just a small movement of his head.

But she saw it. He knew because she looked relieved. Just a little bit.

"Good," she said. Then she rose, turned and ran out the door.

Jonny watched her and watched where she exited, until the fog obscured everything again.

* * *

><p>Jessie wasn't sure what the stupid lawyer expected of her.<p>

She sat, with her mother and father and Dr. Goodwyn and Jonny's lawyer (too many people, really), in some stupid conference room at the city district attorney's office. For twenty minutes now the attorney appointed to prosecute Jonny's case had been asking her questions and the only answers she'd given him were her name and age and other stupid personal things that meant nothing.

He was getting pretty worked up because she wouldn't tell him anything about what happened.

Stupid lawyer.

Dr. Goodwyn had stepped in a couple of times when she'd recognized Jessie getting agitated.

So she was good for something. Jessie gave her that.

At first she hadn't answered his questions because she couldn't do it. Just couldn't talk about what happened.

Dr. Goodwyn had warned the stupid lawyer that Jessie had spoken to nobody of what had happened and so he shouldn't expect anything. Her father had confirmed it.

But the stupid lawyer with his stupid arrogance had ignored them and started, once he got through her personal details, by asking point blank what had happened with Zach Ellis.

Now Jessie refused to even look at him. She wished everybody else would do her the same favor. She propped her feet on the edge of her chair, hugged her knees to her chest and rested her chin on them. And stared at the table wearing a defiant frown. Now she wouldn't answer his questions because it pissed him off so.

And because she just couldn't talk about what happened.

Jonny sat out in the waiting room with Dr. Quest and Hadji. If the stupid lawyer thought he was getting nowhere with her, just wait until he started questioning Jonny.

Scratch that. Jessie wanted this stupid lawyer nowhere near Jonny.

After Jessie ignored another three or four questions and the stupid lawyer got all worked up again, her father requested they end the deposition. But that stupid lawyer refused. Race looked to Jonny's attorney for help, but he shook his head that there was nothing he could do. Race sighed loudly and angrily and set the stupid lawyer with the most threatening, unhappy glare he had in his arsenal.

Jessie almost felt bad. She could see the way he wilted somewhat under her father's most dangerous gaze. But he wouldn't be deterred.

He fired another question at Jessie. Or rather, the same question worded differently as if she wasn't smart enough to figure that out.

She was really thankful Dr. Goodwyn never used that tactic on her.

She rested her cheek on her knees and closed her eyes.

She swore she could hear the stupid lawyer's anger rising.

Jonny's lawyer finally cut in. "This is obviously getting us nowhere. Can we please agree to postpone this until Ms. Bannon and Mr. Quest are ready to cooperate?"

"She needs to cooperate now. A boy is dead, Mr. Fitzmichael, and her friend is in a lot of trouble."

Jessie jumped to her feet at the same time as her father. They leaned forward toward the _stupid lawyer_, hands flat on the table, in the exact same stance.

"What exactly are you saying?" The tone of Race's voice made his gaze seem like a nice summer day.

Jessie was ready with her own retort, but something else caught her ear. Something coming from the waiting area.

Someone yelling.

Her father had heard too and soon after her mother picked up the noise.

Dr. Quest and Hadji's voices joined the yelling.

Jessie dashed out of the room, ignoring the stupid lawyer's protests, and then stopped abruptly at the sight before her.

Mrs. Ellis stood in the doorway, her vicious stare aimed at Jonny, yelling at him about-

Jessie jumped in front of the woman. She could've hit the shrew, but that wouldn't help Jonny.

"How dare you!"

Mrs. Ellis looked surprised at Jessie's audacity. But only for a moment. Her eyes darkened as she moved her focus from Jonny to Jessie.

"It's _my_ son that's-"

"Do you _know_ what he was doing to me?"

Now Ms. Ellis looked affronted. Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped into a little "o". Then she composed herself.

"You little liar. Zach would never-"

No. Jessie wasn't going to listen to such blatant denial. Her next words cut the shrew off.

"But he did."

Mrs. Ellis' stood blinking at Jessie. This pause lasted longest of all. Then she lunged forward at Jessie, only to be caught by the stupid lawyer and his secretary, pulling her screaming and thrashing from the office.

Jessie didn't flinch. Her parents moved in front of her. Her father faced his back to her like he would protect her from that shrew if she got loose. Her mother looked her up and down like the woman had actually touched her and might have hurt her. She kept reaching as if to touch her and then stopping herself.

Jessie couldn't stand either of them.

She turned around and Jonny fell into her view. Dr. Quest and Hadji were trying to comfort him. She pushed her way between them and dropped to a crouch in front of her best friend. With her hands on his knees for balance, she caught his blue eyes, dark and stormy, and held his gaze.

He looked as surprised as Mrs. Ellis.

_That shrew._

"Don't you dare listen to her."

Jessie felt herself shaking with the anger she still felt for that woman. She wouldn't allow her poison words to hurt Jonny.

"You hear me? It wasn't your fault."

He didn't seem to be hearing her. She chewed her lip as she waited for something to show her words were getting through to him.

He had to hear her. That shrew's words weren't going to be the last thing Jonny heard.

How much longer could she stand to be in his sight?

No. She wouldn't go until she knew.

"It wasn't your fault."

She watched his irises move back and forth. His lips bobbed around, but he didn't say anything. He finally just closed his mouth.

"Don't you believe a word she said."

A beat and then he nodded his head at her. A movement so small she would have missed it if she hadn't been looking for it.

But she'd seen it. And he'd heard her.

_Good._

She didn't know how effective her words would be on him, but she couldn't be near him anymore.

She knew it was wrong, but she rose and ran out the door.

Her parents followed right behind her. Her mother hovered again, almost touching her but remembering not to, unsure what to say.

Her father hung further back, giving her her space. She met his gaze knowing all her pain and hurt showed plain on her face.

"You did good, Jess," he whispered to her.

It was what she needed to hear.


	12. Chapter 12

Title: Blue-eyed Angel, 12/?

Author: Goddess Evie  
>Date: January 7, 2014<br>Category: JJHR, Angst  
>Summary: Making progress.<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "The Darkness I Know Well"; it is from Spring Awakening. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing.

Author's Note: Thank you, thank you, thank you! For all the reviews and follows and favorites even during my long absence. I had a VERY busy semester that kept me from certain things like watching TV and writing fic. But as I always promise, this fic will be finished! And since one of my new year's resolutions is to write or edit 15 minutes a day, I should be making progress on this with a little more regularity.

Anyways, thank you all for the patience. This chapter is a little longer than some of the more recent ones and I'm pretty happy with it. I hope you are too.

Chapter 12: _There is a part I can't tell about the dark I know well._

So long as Jonny held the image of Jessie looking up at him, mouth set in a determined line, eyes glowing with anger, he could keep the fog at bay. It still encroached at the edges of his vision, threatening to overtake him once more if he stumbled in his concentration in the slightest, but at least for now he could sense Hadji at his side, see a thin silhouette even, instead of just guessing his brother was there. And he knew he was back at the compound sitting on the couch in the rec room. He even remembered the trip home from wherever they'd been. He still hadn't learned that.

But the image was fading. No matter how hard he focused, her face grew fuzzy and dim. He clenched his hands into fists as he put every effort into keeping that image from leaving him, but the fog grew denser as her face disintegrated.

And then the fog won and the only face he could see was Zach Ellis' looming at him through the mist. The way he'd looked just before he'd died.

Jonny clenched his eyes closed just as tightly as his fists.

And then he opened them, sitting up straight.

Because he sensed her. The fog couldn't mask even her presence.

As he turned around to where she stood, an opening swirled in the fog, like a wind blowing it away. She stood halfway between the back entrance to the rec room and the couch, looking at him with her fists clenched at her sides. By the look on her face, she was every bit as uncomfortable as she'd been the last couple of times she'd shown herself to him. Jonny waited for her to turn and flee like always.

Instead, biting her lower lip, her eyes fixed in that determined way that Jonny was so familiar with, she walked forward toward the couch. She swallowed and unclenched her hands. She almost rested them on the back of the couch, but pulled them away at the last moment.

Jonny watched her do all this with his mouth hanging slightly open. He wanted to tell her how grateful he was for what she'd done back at the…place…with Zach's mother. He would have if he could have made his brain and his mouth work together.

Before he could figure out how to make that happen, Jessie nodded once, turned to face away from Jonny and then sank to the floor. Jonny pulled himself forward to look at her, sitting against the back of the couch with her knees pulled up against her chest and her arms wrapped tightly around them.

She looked back at him, just a short glance, and then buried her face into her knees.

Jonny relaxed, turning to sit forward. He looked at Hadji who wore a surprised expression that matched the way Jonny felt.

Jessie was here and it seemed like she was staying. Even if he couldn't see her, he could sense her nearness.

So long as she stayed near, there was no danger of the fog coming back.

* * *

><p>It took every last iota of strength Jessie had not to flee from the room. And she wasn't even in Jonny's line of sight.<p>

_This is for him._

She remembered the way he'd looked in that waiting room. First so vulnerable and scared, and then the most alive she'd seen him as she held herself in his sight.

Dr. Goodwin kept telling her that Jonny needed her to help him. And she'd said herself multiple times that she wanted him to be okay. And this was the answer. Be near him.

Jessie hugged her knees tighter and turned to rest her cheek on them. She'd thought Hadji would try talking to Jonny more, but it seemed the elder Quest brother was content with just offering his presence. Jonny needed time. And the support of his family.

And Jessie to not hate being around him.

No, she didn't hate being around him. Honestly, she wanted to be near him. She wanted to be able to be near him. But his closeness made her uncomfortable.

She hated that. Her best friend. The person besides her father she trusted the most. He'd saved her. And he'd gone to the extreme to do it.

Jessie shifted to lie on her side, hugging herself. She heard shifting on the couch, but didn't look to see if Jonny was peeking at her. It was better not to know.

Her mother wandered by the back entrance, pausing only long enough to take stock of the situation and offer Jessie a small smile before moving on. Dr. Quest walked by as well, but he stopped abruptly when he saw his sons and Jessie. He took a few moments to study them in the way that he had. He even walked a few steps into the room, crouched down and addressed Jessie softly.

"Would you like a pillow or a blanket?"

Jessie shook her head, resolutely not looking in the direction of the couch. "I'm fine."

"Alright." Dr. Quest rose and turned and left.

But Jessie hadn't missed the gratitude in his periwinkle eyes and it gave her a spark of warmth in her belly. Just for a moment.

Without meaning to, Jessie fell asleep, though she didn't realize it until she was waking up again. Another nightmare, but she didn't wake from it screaming like the other times. She was crying out, disoriented for a moment, until she remembered where she was. And who else was there.

She almost ran in that moment. Jonny's presence coupled with her dream of Zach was almost too much. But she stopped herself at the last moment and just curled up on herself.

A blanket fell on her from over the back of the couch. She glanced up, but she didn't see Jonny or Hadji, though she knew they were there. Unwrapping one arm from around herself, she grabbed the edge of the blanket and tugged it up over her shoulder.

Jessie felt more shielded even if it was just a blanket. She sorta regretted not taking Dr. Quest up on his offer…how long ago was it? She didn't know how long her nap had been. She had no way of marking the passage of time.

She studied the shadows, but she hadn't noted their length or position before she'd fallen asleep, so it was no use trying to figure out the difference. And did it really matter? She had nothing pressing on her time, no urgent event. Except for her visits with Dr. Goodwyn.

After the incidents this afternoon, it would definitely be a while before she or Jonny had to deal with anything even remotely legal. Which was good, because that meant they'd also be able to avoid Zach's mother.

Jessie's mouth pressed into a line and her body went rigid. She forced herself to relax. Getting upset over that did no good lying on the floor in the Quest Compound and covered with a blanket. The woman wasn't here. Jessie breathed deeply to calm herself.

And woke up again, just as another nightmare was starting, to the sound of her father's voice.

"You three need to eat something."

She didn't question how he knew she was back there. She knew he couldn't see her, shielded as she was by the couch. But he knew, as he always did.

Jessie sat up, leaning against the couch again and pushing hair out of her face. Honestly, even if they were short naps, they made her feel better. She was so tired—for lack of a better word—of the constant fatigue she carried around with her from the sleepless nights she endured.

_How come I can sleep now and not when I'm supposed to?_

Perhaps it was the daylight. Something in her subconscious felt safer sleeping in the light of day. Even though the attack had happened in the middle of the aftern-

Whatever. It didn't matter.

"I mean it. I'm not asking you to eat much. Just eat something."

Hadji was trying to coax Jonny from the rec room, but Jessie hadn't felt the movement of him leaving the couch. And she knew she wouldn't unless she did something.

She stood, letting the blanket fall to her feet, though she kept her back to her father and friends. She had to take a moment to build up her will power before she could turn to face them. Jonny was half turned looking at her. He couldn't help himself, she knew, but he was still conscious of how it affected her.

"So what's for dinner?" she asked.

A look of relief passed her father's face and was gone again. Jessie walked around the couch and to the entrance out into the hall. She didn't stop to see if Jonny and Hadji would follow. That was too much.

Race walked just behind her to the kitchen. At the counter three bowls of soup—really not much more than a broth—waited, still steaming. Jessie took the stool in front of a bowl on one end.

"Jess, you don't have to-"

"It's okay." Though soft, her words cut off her father effectively. "Dr. Goodwyn said…"

"Do you want me to stay? Or get your mother?"

Jessie hesitated for a moment before nodding. Let him take that how he would.

She stiffened when she sensed Hadji and Jonny enter. She didn't look. She couldn't, so she relied on the way she could sense their movements. Just like her father.

Hadji settled into the stool next to her, she saw in her peripheral vision.

That meant Jonny was on his other side. Good. She could handle that, she thought. She relaxed marginally.

Making the effort to act as normally as possible, Hadji picked up his spoon and began eating. Jessie waited for Jonny to as well. Her irises moved to the corners of her eyes as she waited to see movement on the other side of Hadji.

None.

Jessie set her jaw and picked up her own spoon. She paused a moment to see what Jonny would do.

Nothing.

Adjusting her grip, Jessie dipped the spoon into the broth and brought it to her mouth, all the time hyper aware of what Jonny was doing. She repeated the action a couple more times. Still no reaction from Jonny.

"You have to eat."

She spoke softly without turning her head, but she was still watching from the corner of her eyes. She caught slight spasm in Jonny's hand, so she knew he'd heard. Hadji and her dad were frozen so that Jessie wondered, fleetingly, if they were breathing.

_Come on. Do something._

Slowly, Jonny moved to pick up his spoon and begin eating. Hadji and Race relaxed and Jessie did too. She resumed eating, if for nothing else than for Jonny. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt hungry. She certainly didn't now, but she could do this for Jonny.

When they were finished, Hadji cleared all three bowls away. As he moved from between Jessie and Jonny, she angled herself away from the younger brother. Trying didn't mean she was perfect at this. She truly hoped Jonny understood that.

"Anybody want seconds?" Race asked.

Nobody responded. Race knew how to take hints.

Hadji led Jonny from the stool. Jessie guessed he would take Jonny back to the rec room. She might as well follow. Perhaps if she kept at it long enough, this would get easier.

As she exited the kitchen, she heard her father's voice softly behind her.

"I'm proud of you, Jess."

* * *

><p>Dr. Goodwyn sat in her office in one of the wing back chairs with Jessie sitting in the other. The girl sat up straight, but she stared at her hands in her lap with a deep frown on her face. She looked more tired than usual.<p>

"Are you sleeping well?" Dr. Goodwyn asked.

Jessie shrugged. "No better or worse than usual."

It was the answer Dr. Goodwyn expected. She'd already conferenced with Jessie's parents and Dr. Quest and she knew what Jessie had been doing the last couple of days. And thus why Jessie looked so tired.

"Your father tells me you've been making the effort to be near Jonny."

Being forward with Jessie was the best bet, Dr. Goodwyn had learned quickly. Jessie's head snapped up and she stared at the older lady with wide green eyes. Dr. Goodwyn waited for the shock to fade, for Jessie to look back down to her lap as she usually did.

This time she surprised Dr. Goodwyn.

"I couldn't abandon him again after…what happened…"

"I understand. That was very noble of you."

Jessie shook her head. It was almost an angry action. "I didn't do it to be noble!"

"Then why did you do it?"

"Because Jonny is a good person. The best person. And he doesn't deserve any of this. He especially didn't deserve any of the things that _woman_ said to him."

The way Jessie said "woman" sounded like a curse.

"Have you told Jonny that?"

"I told him in that moment."

"Have you tried talking to him since then?"

Jessie hesitated a moment before she shook her head and then her gaze dropped again.

"I would like you to try now."

Again with the bluntness, but Jessie didn't react as extremely as before. Still, Dr. Goodwyn was able to grab her emerald gaze again.

"What do you want me to say to him?"

"Whatever you want."

Jessie squeezed her eyes tight. "Nothing I say will make him better."

"Not immediately, no. But you could say something to him that might help him begin to heal."

"Like what?"

"How about why it's so hard for you to be in his presence."

Jessie went pale. "I can't do that."

"You don't think he'll understand?"

"It's not good to bring up anything that happened that afternoon to Jonny."

Dr. Goodwyn made her voice soft and gentle and nurturing. "He needs to face it sometime, Jessie. You both do. I'm not asking you to relive the whole thing. Just give him this little truth."

Jessie's chin was trembling as she stared at some point past the doctor's head, but Dr. Goodwyn could see her coming to a resolution.

"I suppose I could try. If you really think it might help him."

"I do," Dr. Goodwyn said and meant it.

Jessie took a deep breath and nodded.

Dr. Goodwyn rose and placed one of the chairs in front of her desk across from Jessie. Then she went to the door and opened it. Every person in the waiting room reacted in some way. Even Jonny, though he reacted more slowly than the others, his gaze coming up to look at Dr. Goodwyn and then beyond her.

_Searching for Jessie._

When Dr. Goodwyn requested Jonny to step into her office, all three adults showed their uncertainty in their expressions, though they said nothing. Dr. Goodwyn chose to ignore them. Acknowledging their doubt would only give them the opportunity to voice what she saw in their faces, and she had more important issues at hand.

Dr. Goodwyn opened the door wider to allow Jonny to pass. He slowed for a moment before fully entering the room and then stood awkwardly to the side just inside the door. Dr. Goodwyn continued to ignore the adults in her waiting room, but she caught a glimpse of Hadji's face. It was the only one that was the least bit hopeful.

"Jonny, please have a seat right here."

Dr. Goodwyn put her hands on the back of the chair she'd moved. Jessie was now staring resolutely at the floor. Jonny hesitantly took the few steps and lowered himself into the chair. But Dr. Goodwyn could see just how much more aware he was just being in Jessie's presence. The only other time she'd seen him like that was in the district attorney's waiting room.

Dr. Goodwyn returned to her seat as well. "Jonny, Jessie has something she'd like to say to you." Then she sat back. It was up to them now.

Jonny's eyes flickered to and away from Jessie constantly. Dr. Goodwyn wondered if he caught the way Jessie was mentally trying to prepare herself and how much effort it was taking. She didn't think he missed a single thing about her.

Finally Jessie raised her head and looked straight at Jonny, the entire time looking like she could cry at any moment. She swallowed visibly and her lips moved, making no sound, as her hands twisted around the pillow.

_Maybe she wasn't ready for this._

Then Jessie spoke. "I know you think I hate you."

Jonny's gaze fell on Jessie and stayed there. He made no reaction to her words, except for the intensity of his look.

"I don't hate you. I couldn't. I promise."

Jessie paused and Dr. Goodwyn could see the way she searched his face for any reaction, but his expression didn't change.

"I-you saved me. Like you always do. And I'm not even mad about it this time."

She gave a humorless laugh and looked down at her hands. Then she made herself look at Jonny again.

"It's just that, whenever you look at me, I can't help but think that you're seeing me like I was that day. And I don't want you to think of me like that. I can't bear the thought of you seeing me like that-"

Jonny stopped Jessie with his hand on hers. Dr. Goodwyn watched closely to see how she would react. After a moment of looking at their hands touching, Jessie looked back up at Jonny's face. She didn't pull her hand away from Jonny's.

And when Jonny was sure he had Jessie's full attention, he shook his head very deliberately at her. Dr. Goodwyn didn't doubt there was some deeper level of communication happening between the two, even if she couldn't see it. But she did see as Jessie curled her fingers around Jonny's hand and he brought his other hand up and then so did she. With their hands all entangled, they both relaxed visibly.

Dr. Goodwyn almost expected a hug or even just a smile exchanged between them, but they didn't go that far. It was a step in the right direction, though.

"You both did very well. I know this was hard."

Jessie and Jonny both turned to look at her as if they'd forgotten she was even there.

"I think we'll call that a day."


End file.
